Oh My Jashin! Akatsuki
by TheDarkLadyKira
Summary: The Aktasuki get turned into kittens don't they always and come to our world only to get adopted by four girls. Their Mission: Find the descendent of a missing-nin who fled to this world. Their Problem: 2 are Fangirls and the child genuis is suspicious.
1. Kitties, kitties, kitties

**AN: I know this has been done a thousand times before, but hopefully you'll enjoy my take on it, I hope nobody's OOC.

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The Pound

The ten kittens and one mother cat they'd brought in that day were unusual. They didn't look anything like the sorrel colored queen that seemed to be taking care of them, which in itself wasn't unusual, but the way they acted was. The Russian Blue seemed glued to the small black one that had unusual gray eyes and stayed in the corner away from the others as the Russian Blue mewed at it as if carrying on a conversation. The amber colored one with black markings that resembled body piercing, hovered in the corner with the only female kitten who was beautifully colored. She had a pale blue and silver coat, with dark blue eyes and white swirl on her forehead that they thought resembled a flower. The excitable orange tabby with swirl markings kept jumping around the cage and bouncing on the long haired yellow cat, which had blue eyes and a bit of fur that fell in its face. The yellow long hair would hiss at the tabby when it did this and give it a smack, causing it the tumble away before it would settle beside the red cat with a white chest and white paws, mewing to it as if annoyed. The black and white tortoiseshell watched all this with amusement, short tail twitching slightly, before helping the energetic kitten up. Finally the two most unusually colored kittens kept hissing at each other. One was a silvery white color with light purple eyes that were almost pink, it was the runt of the litter even smaller than the Russian Blue. The other was a dark brown one with odd black markings that looked almost like stitches. At first the workers had thought they'd have to separate them, but every time they'd come to do it the amber colored kitten would hiss and they'd settle down or the mother cat would pick the white kitten up by its scruff, the little thing squirming and hissing, and force it to submit to a bath. Yes they were definitely odd.

"**I swear to Jashin if I have to take another f---ing bath I'm scratching her ear off!**" Hidan snarled bristling his white fur in an attempt to make him look threatening. Kakuzu snorted derisively at this causing the small white kitten, who was actually an S-class criminal, to leap at him snarling in another attempt to rip his throat out.

"**Hidan. Kakuzu.**" Pein scolded, from the corner he sat in with Konan. "**This isn't the time. We need a plan for when we get separated.**"

"**Yes, Leader-sama.**" Kakuzu mewed his agreement as Hidan hissed a last curse at him, before sitting down.

"**Have you thought of something Leader-sama?**" Itachi questioned walking over to join the growing circle of kit-Akatsuki members. Kisame followed his partner tail dragging on the ground. He was the most unhappy, excluding Hidan, about their temporary forms.

"**Yes Itachi, all of you must get adopted and taking into account that we will likely end up at different places, we must agree upon a meeting place for when we escape our homes.**" Pein informed the unhappy (Not counting Tobi.) bunch of Kitten-criminals.

"**And how exactly do we get adopted, un?**" Deidara questioned unhappily from his place beside Sasori.

"**It's simple, act cute.**" Pein ordered. They looked at him in shock. Act cute? He was asking the most feared criminals in the ninja world to act cute?

"**No f---ing-" **Hidan began puffing up.

"**This isn't negotiable, Hidan.**" Pein told him coldly. "**So get adopted and if you can, try and stay with your partners. Head towards the middle of the woods where we first arrived, if nobody is there in a month assume us dead.** **Meeting adjourned.**" The Akatsuki members broke apart grumbling (or cursing) about their orders. The sorrel colored queen with them chuckled to herself. Her adopted kits were an odd bunch, planning and speaking weird, not to mention they came with peculiar names, but she loved them the same. She'd been pleased to find the kits right after she'd lost her own and they'd been so small and helpless she couldn't just abandon them.

"**Will you be alright without us Sora-okaa-san?**" Tobi questioned worriedly as he snuggled close towards the mother cat. Sora gave him a comforting lick on the ear.

"**Every mother knows one day she has to let her kits go. As long as you ten are settled into good homes with kind two legs I'll be fine.**" She informed him causing the small tabby to purr as he graciously submitted to a quick bath. Hidan started muttering about not being his f---ing mother, until Pein hissed at him to shut up. As fate would have it, that was the moment three teenage girls walked in chattering happily. The Akatsuki looked up curiously as they walked down the hall. Pein gave them a pointed look as the girls stopped in front of the cage. The plan was in action.

Tobi bounded foreword jumping on the bars and mewing at them hopefully, Deidara flipped on his back batting at Sasori's twitching tail playfully and Sasori simply laid down looking sleepy, refusing to do anything too degrading. Kakuzu, grimacing as he did, copied Tobi, knowing with his odd looks he'd need the most help. Itachi and Kisame hung back in the corner peacefully boycotting. Zetsu knocked Tobi down and took his place on the bar, causing Tobi to mew pitifully and the girls to squeal at the cuteness. Konan stretched opening her tiny mouth to reveal a little pink tongue, which caused the girls to start on about her. Pein shifted from paw to paw uncomfortable and not knowing what to do. Hidan sat in the middle back to them point blank refusing to look at them. Sora looked at Pein amused and decided to help her kit, she moved his small body towards the front with a paw, he took one look at the strangely tall girls and looked down burying his face in his paws playing the shy card. High pitched squeal.

"Ah, look at the tabby, he's so sweet." The dark skinned girl cooed pointing towards Tobi who was rolling around happily. The tall blonde pulled at her arm pointing at Itachi and Kisame in the corner.

"Those two are cute, they look a little shy." She pointed out smiling brightly at them. The smaller, pale black haired girl bent down to examine Pein intently.

"I say we choose this one," she told her friends pointing a black fingernail at him as her tongue toyed with her lip ring. The blonde rolled her eyes.

"Ray, you only want that one 'cause he looks pierced like you." She said scathingly causing the shorter girl to glare at her.

"And what's wrong with piercings?!" she snapped brown eyes flashing. The blonde girl snorted.

"They're disgusting, I mean come on self-mutilation much." She countered with another eye roll.

"Shut it preppy!"

"Make me witch!"

"It's Wiccan pompom for brains!"

"Bite me Zombie-chick!"

"You wish dumb blonde!"

"Now guys lets calm down and pick out her present. Remember it's what she likes not what we like." the dark girl said her accent making her voice twang.

"Fine." The black haired girl snapped.

"For Mom." The blonde agreed.

"**Are you sure we have to be adopted Leader-sama, couldn't we just break out?**" Itachi questioned eyeing his possible owners warily.

"**No.**" Pein told him firmly. He and Konan had tried it all night, even involving Sora to no avail.

"The guys at the front said they were family." the dark skinned girl pointed out. The blonde nodded eyes suddenly troubled.

"Mother wouldn't like us breaking up families." the blonde said eyeing the kittens nervously.

"True," the Wiccan agreed.

"So," the blonde began a gleam in her eye. The black haired girl nodded her consent and the dark skinned girl sighed looking at her wallet despondently.

"We get them all." She finished happily.

"Okay," the dark skinned girl sighed, and looked up at her lips pursed.

"But you and Reagan are paying the adoption fees, Leslie." She dark skinned girl told her, before her hazel eyes flickered back to the cats. "What about the Mom?" Reagan looked up surprised.

"Didn't you hear?" she paused as the dark skinned girl shook her head. "The owners adopting her. The cat just wouldn't leave until her kittens are adopted or at least that's how they figure considering her reactions when they tried to separate them." Savannah nodded here mouth forming a small 'O'.

… … … … … …

"Welcome home precious darlings!" Leslie chirped as the Akatsuki were let out of the cat carrier they'd traveled in. They reluctantly left sniffing the air curiously and looking up at their new _owners_ who were on the ground watching them.

"'kay there's ten of them, so I say each of us name two and leave the last four to Mom since they're her presents." Leslie said reasonably. Reagan leaned foreword and deftly scooped up Zetsu and Pein.

"I call these two!" she informed them happily. Leslie grabbed Kisame and Konan, before passing Savannah Itachi and Deidara.

"Okay, kitties were going to give you whatever names we feel like and you're going to like them 'cause you don't have a choice, the rest of you freaks will just have to wait until Mom gets home for your names." Leslie lectured them casually. Tobi actually looked disappointed. "Okay you first mister blue," she informed them causing Reagan to roll her eyes and Savannah to shake her head giggling slightly.

"I'll name you Bruce," she announced pleasantly. Kisame's heart sank at the foreign name.

"You're naming him after a shark?" Reagan asked looking down at the newly dubbed Bruce pityingly.

"Yep, he looks kinda fishy, and sharks are fish after all." The Akatsuki were laughing or smirking at the girl's naïve comments and Kisame soberly went off to mope under the table.

"What's his problem?" Leslie asked obliviously. Reagan looked at her in disgust.

"He just got the name Bruce, I'd go hide in the emo corner too." Reagan informed her before looking down at Zetsu an evil gleam in her eye. The cannibal shifted uncomfortably suddenly nervous.

"I shall dub thee I.C.P." she told him solemnly. Leslie glared at her accusingly.

"And you think Bruce is bad." She said in poorly disguised disgust before she looked down at Zetsu pityingly. "You named him Insane Clown Posse. God, it's a tone deaf band, a psychotic one at that."

"They are not!" Reagan protested and then pouted at their incredulous looks. Leslie shook her head as if pained by the ridiculous name.

"Look, poor Iccup's gone to stay with Bruce in the emo corner." Leslie stayed pityingly as Zetsu took a seat beside a still moping Kisame.

"Iccup?" Reagan asked eyebrow raised.

"Yes, Iccup," Leslie repeated sternly, her blue eyes narrowed. "Since you insist we name the poor creature I.C.P. I shall call him Iccup, since that is how I.C.P. is pronounced." Reagan opened her mouth to protest only to hear Savannah giggle slightly.

"Iccup's a cute name, it fits." The girl told them smiling happily. Reagan looked at her with a pout.

"Thanks for the support Savvy," the girl muttered crossing her arms offended.

"Well it's my turn," Savannah decided looking at Deidara attentively, her dark brown brows knitting together.

"Nemo," she decided. The blonde was horrified and with an insulted huff joined the other two in the emo corner. Savannah pouted at Deidara's reaction. "Oh, come on it isn't _that_ bad." He gave her a skeptical look, or as skeptical as a one pound fuzz ball can look. "Well it isn't." she argued defensively and then suddenly stopped horror and embarrassment dawning on her face at the other girls disbelieving looks.

"Did I just have an argument with a cat?" she squeaked. Reagan nodded solemnly as Leslie reached over and patted Savannah's shoulder comfortingly.

"And he argued back!" Savannah accused shrilly. The others shrugged clearly not finding this odd in the least. Leslie quickly picked up Konan looking her over intently. The only girl member of the Akatsuki stiffened ready for whatever horror of a name these girls could think of. Finally, in an undeniably smug voice, she said, "Bella."

Reagan snorted at this, muttering something about "never should have gotten her those accursed books," Konan though walked over to sit at Reagan's knees not finding her name completely disreputable. Leslie looked at Reagan with a cocky grin.

"Oh bite me Blondie," the girl snapped looking down at Pein. "Alright Mister Piercings from now on you shall be Pain." They all gaped at her, even the emos looked up. Leslie smacked her.

"You sick twisted individual!" she accused. Reagan glared at her and was sailing across the table knocking her to the ground. Soon they were rolling around on the ground hissing and tearing. The cats were divided.

"**Rip her hair out Blondie!**" Hidan shouted gleefully watching the violence.

"**Kick her ass Wiccan, un!**" Deidara cheered taking the opposite side. The others looked at the fighting rolling girls surprised and then turned to look at Savannah who apparently wasn't affected by this in the least. She petted Itachi's fur as she examined him critically. Reagan pinned the bigger girl to the ground and her arm twisted behind her back.

"So what you naming him Savvy?" the dark haired girl questioned curious perfectly calm despite the claw marks on her cheeks that were beading with blood. Hidan and Deidara a little disappointed that their fun had ended so quickly looked up excitedly to see the Uchiha get, what they hoped, was an embarrassing horrible name.

"Toboe." Savannah told them. The ones who'd already been named hissed at the startled Uchiha.

"**Oh sure give him the normal name, un!**" Deidara snarled puffing up his thick coat. "**Yet you name me Nemo, Nemo, un!**"

"Hey he likes it!" Leslie pointed out, deftly flipping over Reagan and pinning both arms to the ground with her legs. It was true, Itachi didn't go hide in the emo corner and had stayed in Savannah's lap perfectly fine with his new found name. Hidan and Deidara began to mutter mutinously in the corner wanting to watch more girl violence and muttering something about 'damn Uchihas always getting their ways'. None of them noticed, until Tobi gave a squeal of surprise at the slim red head that entered. Unlike the other girls, who looked anywhere from the age eighteen to twenty, she couldn't be older than fifteen and a small one at that. She had short messily cut hair and heavy lidded honey-brown eyes.

"What are you two doing?" she questioned coldly dropping her bag in a nearby chair as she walked across the room, removing her shoes as she did with a slight push. Reagan and Leslie paused looking up at her guiltily.

"Now Mommy," Leslie began nervously. Causing those gold brown eyes to zero in on her and narrow. Reagan shifted to hide behind the tall blonde who yelped fearfully.

"**MOMMY!**" half the Akatsuki (excluding Zetsu, Pein, Konan, Itachi, and Sasori) shouted with different emotions. The unnamed ones horrified and surprised, Tobi happy to finally meet the person who'd named him and the rest laughing and surprised.

"**It's a f---ing female Sasori!**" Hidan wailed in horror causing Deidara to turn on him bristling.

"**You got a problem with my Danna, un?**" the blonde hiss possessively ignoring the glare sent his way for the use of the possessive.

"**No, no, Deidara-senpai!**" Tobi shouted trying to for stall and argument. "**I'm sure Hidan-senpai just wanted to say how much Okaa-san looks like Sasori-senpai!**" Both the kittens hissed at him to shut up, but their actions had already caught the Sasori look a like's attention. She bent down and lifted up Tobi who'd been right next to her foot in an oddly graceful maneuver.

"When did we get a cat? Or should I say cats." She questioned looking at the assembled kittens. Leslie perked up clearly pleased by the distraction.

"Oh, it's a belated birthday gift from us. Those for are for you to name." Leslie told her happily, pointing out Sasori, Kakuzu, Tobi and Hidan.

"I see," the girl replied, brushing a bit of hair from her face as she looked Tobi over. "Tobi." She decided causing all the Akatsuki to freeze, their breathing ceasing. "He's a Tobi. I had a dog named that once and it seems appropriate." She explained to the other girls, sitting down, knees tucked under her as she settled the happily mewing Tobi in her lap to examine the others. She picked up Sasori next. "Marinette," she informed the shocked puppeteer placing him next to Tobi and reaching for Kakuzu. "Stitches," she told him scratching him under his head and getting a startled purr for her troubles, she actually paused a minute to cuddle him, much to the S-class criminals horror, before placing him with the others and picking up the last one a bristling Hidan who glared at her.

The girl looked him over curiously. Clearly startled by his oddly colored eyes, she cuddled him to her chest as she had Kakuzu, allowing the thoughtful and eager, for the three other girls anyway, silence. Hidan simply hissed. Jashin he wished she'd just get it over with. "Ayame," she said pleasantly. The others, or the ones unhappy with their names anyway, growled at yet another of their group getting a normal name instead of the foreign ones the girls insisted on.

"Why in the world would you name him after a snake pedophile, Niamh?" Reagan questioned pronouncing the name Nee-iv. Hidan stiffened horrified and Deidara chuckled.

"**Remind you of anyone Itachi, un?**" the blonde bomber muttered darkly chuckling at the glare he got in reply.

"It fits, they all do." Niamh stated mildly. Leslie leaned over to examine the kittens.

"Well they certainly aren't moping in the emo corner like Bruce, Nemo, and Iccup did." Leslie admitted casually examining the purring Tobi. "And Tobi's so cute!" Savannah nodded her approval and Reagan shrugged it off, though she did glare at Leslie for her insistence in refusing to use I.C.P.

"Iccup? Bruce?" Niamh questioned curiously, causing Savannah to explain what each cat was named. The girl gave a delicate shrug of her tiny shoulder picking up Kakuzu and Tobi to carry along with Hidan. Sasori deciding she was the sanest one, next to Savannah, of the group leapt on her shoulder quickly evading Reagan's hands.

"Come on time to show them where they'll be living." The blonde informed them happily scooping up Kisame and Zetsu, the others nodded, Savannah, who still held Itachi picking up Deidara, as Reagan grabbed Pein and Konan. The Akatsuki warily eyed the girls more than half regretting ever letting Pein talk them into this _top secret and extremely dangerous _mission.


	2. They Aren't Normal!

**AN: A bit more serious tone, but next chapter is when it really gets going._

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_Akatsuki's POV_

The first room they showed them was relatively normal, if you didn't count the hundreds of wolf memorabilia that decorated. The Akatsuki were sat down to explore the nooks and crannies of this room, while the girls talked. Pein, Itachi and Konan though decided it was best to learn about their landlords. It turned out the room was Savannah's.

"Gosh Savvy, you real don't know how not to over do it with the Wolf's Rain obsession do you?" Reagan asked sarcastically eyeing a poster of a young man and white wolf in front of him. The girl blushed, but didn't lie down and take it.

"Oh it's nothing compared to the, oh, what did Les call it, oh yes _shrine_, you have to a certain someone in your closet." The girl pointed out innocently. Reagan huffed her pale cheeks turning red, but didn't comment again. The three Akatsuki members shared a look, they'd dismissed making Savannah an ally at first, but she clearly had some sway over the crazy Wiccan, which meant they were sticking to her like glue.

Leslie snickered at Savannah's comment, causing Reagan to turn on her, brown eyes ready for a fight. "Oh, does the cheerleader have something to say? Especially considering what her room looks like. You're even worse than me."

"At least I don't worship at the alter in my closet every night!" she countered. It was clear to the watching Akatsuki that these girls were dying for another fight. Konan looked up at the watching red head curiously. She obviously had sway over these two. And judging by their earlier reactions, fighting was not allowed. Konan was not disappointed.

"Tsukuyomi," the red head told them in clear warning. Both girls froze and turned to stare at her horrified. Itachi stiffened at the casual mention of the Uchiha's technique and turned to stare at the girl appalled. Had she honestly just threatened to Tsukuyomi her friends for a minor transgression? And how did she know or have the capability to do it in the first place? She was no Uchiha. Itachi turned to glare at the shocked Pein and Konan accusingly.

"You wouldn't!" Leslie squeaked out in barely disguised revulsion.

"Shut up, Les! You remember what happened last time we asked that!" Reagan shrieked her voice raising a few pitches as she eyed the petite girl in a terrified respect, like what you feel for a predator. Both girls whimpered trembling at the memory. Savannah giggled. They glared at her.

"What, it'd only be three days. You could live that long without them." Leslie hissed and Reagan shook her head in pitying disgust, looking at Savannah solemnly.

"How would you feel if she did that-that, horrible," Reagan began.

"Disgusting," Leslie chimed in.

"Revolting." Reagan agreed.

"Torturous." Leslie chirped.

"Inhumane," they toned together.

"Practice to you." Reagan finished. Savannah gave them half way amused, half way exasperated looks. Niamh rolled her eyes at their reactions. The Akatsuki shared confused looks. Nobody, nobody, even a masochist like Hidan was this casual after undergoing Tsukuyomi for three days. Had they heard wrong?

"For the love of god," Niamh stated face palming. "Its three days without Naruto is that honestly too much to ask? And none of you have yet to explain to me why you nicknamed it that." The red head muttered irritably. The Akatsuki all shared freaked out looks. How did these girls know the Nine-tails Jinchuriki? Itachi eyed the insulted looking Reagan and Leslie warily. Why did he have a bad feeling all of the sudden?

… … … … … …

**~Meanwhile with the Other Members~**

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"**Please, tell me that isn't what I think it is, un.**" a horrified Deidara begged eyes wide with horror. None of his fellow members had anything to assure him it indeed wasn't what lay before them. "**For the love of god turn the page! Turn it, un!**" he shrieked burying his hot face in his paws. A stunned Tobi did only to give a squeal at the even worse image, in Deidara's opinion.

"**My eyes. My eyes!**" a traumatized Sasori was muttering as he rocked back and forth not able to even glance at what had caused the reaction. They'd been looking under the bed when they'd knocked over a sketchbook, curious Tobi had opened only to squeal. The other Akatsuki had come to see what had caused the reaction only to be scarred for life. Drawn in color was a picture of a blushing Deidara and Sasori hugging in a clearly intimate manner. It was innocent enough, but it was clear to anyone that the two people on the page were a couple, the next one had shown them sharing a chaste kiss. This was at what point Sasori started hyperventilating.

"**Burn it, un!**" Deidara hissed starring down at a drawing of him hugging Tobi with a smile. "**Burn them all, un!**" Tobi looked up at Deidara hopefully, clearly wishing for a hug, but was disappointed, when Deidara narrowed his eyes at him screaming shrilly, "**Never!**"

Meanwhile Hidan and Kakuzu were chuckling to themselves. Hidan turned to cat-smirk at the hysterical blonde who was searching for something to start a fire with. "**Do you have something you need to tell us Deidara-chan?**" he asked mockingly, throwing a mock shocked look at Sasori.

"**You'd think we'd be the first to know about your relationship.**" He purred as the blonde stiffened and the puppet master went silent. "**Well I guess we shouldn't be too surprised what with you calling him **_**your Danna**_**.**"

"**Sasori no Danna, un?**" the blonde bomber questioned with dangerous calm as they both looked at Hidan.

"**Yes, brat?**" Sasori answered turning to examine the immortal kitten with a scientific interest.

"**How much damage can an immortal body take before it dies, un?**" the blonde continued casually. The puppet master cat-smirked.

"**I'm not sure.**" He admitted, voice suddenly becoming dark and dangerous as they stalked towards the immortal. "**But I'm sure we can find out.**"

Tobi's head snapped back and forth between the two groups torn. Help his Deidara-senpai? Or help Hidan? Deidara-senpai had Sasori so it was unfair. But Hidan had said some mean things to Deidara-senpai. The tabby laid down with a wailing moan of confusion. Kakuzu on the other hand was settling down to enjoy himself. Zetsu sat beside him equally eager.

"**500 ryou Hidan gets in one shot, before Sasori and Deidara rip him to pieces.**" Kakuzu whispered, sounding almost hopeful.

"**We bet he doesn't even get in one.**" Both Zetsu's sides chimed in agreement. The noise, unfortunately for Kakuzu and Zetsu, got the girls attention. Seeing two of what they thought were kittens cornering the smallest of their litter, who they didn't realize was gleeful from the chance to fight, they decided to interfere.

"None of that now," Savannah scolded deftly scooping up Sasori and Deidara. She frowned down at them as the glared at her, eyes perfectly innocent and oblivious. "Honestly Marionette, Nemo, you two shouldn't pick on little Ayame." The two Akatsuki members gave her annoyed glares, which she didn't notice, because her attention was held by a sheepish Tobi attempting to hide the sketchbook.

"Hey guys, look what they got into." Savannah called, causing the other girls to come over to see what the commotion was about. Reagan wrinkled her nose at the image and Leslie pouted.

"So you still making money off the Narutards at campus?" Reagan questioned looking over the images. Savannah nodded blushing slightly at her friends' scrutiny. Leslie peeked over Reagan's shoulder as she leafed through the book. The Akatsuki members looked up at the girls confused by the Narutard comment, until Sasori finally put it together.

"**The nine-tails Jinchuriki?**" he questioned kitty brows going together.

"Sasori no Danna and Dei-kun are awesome characters and all," Leslie began causing the mentioned Akatsuki to stiffen staring up at the girl horrified, by her knowledge. "But they are only meant to be with Sakura." Sasori looked nauseas, having heard of the pinkette who was training under the Slug Sanin. Deidara though looked confused.

"**What is going on, un?!**" Deidara shrieked at Pein as he, Konan, and Itachi approached. Kisame, who'd been off exploring Savannah's plushies, followed oblivious to what had occurred.

"**We aren't sure, but be prepared for worse to come.**" Pein cautioned sharing a wary look with Konan and Itachi. The conversation had only gotten worse as they'd went on. He only prayed that these girls didn't know as much as they seemed…

… … … … … …

_**Niamh's POV**_

Niamh watched the odd cats curiously. She'd noticed Pain, Bella and Toboe seemingly eavesdropping on their earlier conversation and their reactions had been different to say the least. Toboe had developed a nervous twitch every time they discussed something even remotely related to the nickname Reagan and Leslie had given to the time she'd finally made good on her threat. Niamh rolled her eyes, but couldn't help but smile at her step-sister and step-sister's best friend's reaction when they found their rooms Naruto/Akatsuki-less. Niamh honestly wasn't surprised, now that she knew, that they'd named it after Uchiha Itachi's move. He was the one character from their favorite character that she even knew about. Even Savannah liked him, especially since the two girls had skipped ahead into the subbed version and found out about his real reasons. The girls had actually cried and stripped all Sasuke memorabilia from their bedrooms, until they'd finally gotten passed it.

The cats' reactions to Reagan's alter to Hidan, yes it was an alter no matter how much she vehemently denied it. Had been enough to make the girl chuckle with amusement. Ayame looked like he was having some sort of seizure and the others, especially Stitches, had been laughing, or at least looked like they had, except for Pain, Bella, Toboe, and Marionette, who'd looked, if she wasn't mistaken, concerned. They'd shown them her room next, nothing interesting, at least to a Narutard, but compared to other fifteen year old's her's was a bit…different. Her university books were piled neatly on the desk, but the rest of the room was in what she considered neat-chaos. The walls were covered with maps, of the ancient and modern age, and also symbols or decorations she'd found interesting. Like the old katana that wouldn't come out of its sheath from her grandmother's attic, or the white porcelain mask she'd found in a pawn shop that Leslie had dubbed creepy. The room itself was relatively dim, the only furniture were her desk, with laptop on it, her bed which took up most of the room, and the full book shelves that lined the walls unoccupied with decoration. The ground was covered with further piles of books and papers of foreign language and old manuscripts she'd gotten out of vaults or from collectors, then there were her notebooks, term papers, or research papers she'd been studying at the moment. The only normal thing was the pictures of her and the others that also decorated her desk.

Seeing her room the cats relaxed and explored looking at the foreign and sometimes myth logically related things that decorated her room. Nemo and Marionette seemed especially interested in some of the sculptures or old masks that were considered art. Pain and Bella were looking over the book shelves curiously. Stitches seemed particular interested in the porcelain mask along with Toboe. The others drifted around the maze of books curious, but not focusing on anything particular. Niamh was a bit embarrassed, by the almost human interest they took in her things. When they arrived at Leslie's rooms she thought some of them were going to stop breathing right then and there. Every inch of her room was decorated with Naruto memorabilia.

Toboe's twitch came back as he openly gaped at the Itachi and Sasuke plushies that sat side by side in places of honor right behind Deidara and Sasori plushies. Niamh watched curious as the kittens all gathered around the plushies. Nemo was the first who touched one. He poked the Deidara plushie slowly. He jumped back when it moved. Tobi seemed to faint a few seconds when Ayame and Nemo's combined efforts unearthed a swirly orange mask. And eventually they all just settled somewhere to eye the posters that decorated the room. Toboe kept glaring at the one that showed Sasuke and the Snake Pedophile, as Leslie and Reagan called Orochimaru.

"Well I know what I'm getting you for your birthday," Reagan said dryly. Leslie looked up curiously. "An Akatsuki poster you're missing one." Leslie looked up at her as if she'd told her Christmas had come early. The cats though all froze at the mention of the criminal organization. Niamh's eyes narrowed these animals were not normal. She hadn't been declared a child genius from the age of eight for nothing. Pain glanced up at her apparently noticing her scrutiny and hissed something quietly. The rest of the cats relaxed going to explore innocently, acting _normal_. Niamh scoffed, yes that wasn't suspicious in the least. Toboe, she noted, was giving her glances out of the corner of his eye, along with Bella and Pain, who'd taken refuge under Leslie's bedside table, just half hidden by the mattress. Niamh suspicions grew as they took them into the living room and Leslie explained to them about using the littler box. And they listened attentively, understanding every word she said. After this the girls left the cats alone going to make dinner. Niamh quickly cornered Leslie who'd begun boiling water for the instant ramen.

"They aren't normal." Niamh dead panned. Leslie jerked slightly. The eighteen year old glanced up at her blue eyes confused, but it finally clicked who she was talking about. She shrugged in reply.

"So, neither are we." Niamh couldn't argue with that.

"True, but their too intelligent to be normal cats." She pointed out helping her sister break up some noodle packages. Leslie narrowed her eyes at her suspiciously.

"I know that tone Neenee." she stated, frowning disapprovingly, using her childhood pet name for Niamh.

"What tone?" Niamh asked innocently, knowing very well Leslie of all people, no matter how oblivious everyone else found her, would never fall for it.

"The one were you can't keep your nose out of something." She countered.

"Like you can," Niamh pointed out casually, but she smiled. "Who do you think I learned it from, eh, big sister?" Leslie smiled at the title, like Niamh knew she would.

"Alright, but what are you going to do to them?" Leslie asked putting in the noodles and stirring in some chicken to cook in it.

"Oh, nothing to serious, just a few tests to find out who smart they are. Like the do with chimpanzees and parrots." Niamh replied smoothly, it was a half truth and one that Leslie might fall for. Leslie nodded, giving the smaller girl a wary glance, but shaking her head.

"Right, just a few tests." She said disbelievingly. Niamh ignored that. It really was going to be a few tests, well and seeing their reactions to more Naruto info, it seemed the odd behavior and the anime was connected…

… … … … … …

_**Akatsuki's POV**_

"**The red head is suspicious.**" Pein informed them coldly, from his position on the coffee table. He'd called a meeting as soon as the girls had fallen asleep.

"**Like that matters! How the f—k do they know about us?**" Hidan snarled. Kakuzu nodded in a rare moment of agreement.

"**From what Leader-sama, Konan, and I gathered from their earlier conversations in this world we are characters in a manga and anime called Naruto.**" Itachi explained to shocked silence. He glowered at them. "**What?**" he snapped, barely keeping the fur on his spine from bristling.

"**You just said a longer than five word sentence, un.**" Deidara explained.

"**Willingly.**" Kakuzu chimed in. Itachi gave them disgusted looks.

"**Itachi's talkativeness aside,**" Pein began irritated by the lack of attention. "**We are characters in this manga and we can safely assume these girls have intimate knowledge of us. Earlier they were throwing around knowledge of Itachi's Tsukuyomi as if discussing the weather.**" The others in the Akatsuki stiffened eyes wide.

"**F—k.**" Hidan said eloquently.

"**Yes, Hidan I agree.**" Pein said solemnly, his tail's slight twitching the only sign of his annoyance.

"**We must each find out as much as we can about these girls before the full moon, anything we can use against them to either black mail or make the our allies. We will need to gain their trust in this world."** Pein told them calmly. "**Kakuzu and Hidan will take Niamh, Itachi and Kisame Leslie, Deidara and Sasori Savannah, Zetsu and Tobi Reagan. Konan and I will be studying the landscape and learning about our knew world.**"

"**Leader-sama?**" Sasori asked politely. Pein nodded his head in acknowledgement.

"**Why before the full moon?**" Pein didn't answer a few moments.

"**We turn back.**" Pein finally told them, causing them to exchange looks of mixed emotions. "**Hidan, Kakuzu, be especially careful around that girl, meeting dismissed.**"

The others left, going to get some sleep before their busy days tomorrow. Tobi, Pein and Konan said nothing until they were sure the others were gone.

"**What are your plans Madara-sama?**" Pein finally questioned. The Uchiha turned to him, eyes becoming Sharingan.

"**We will use these girls, until it is time to dispose of them. The red head, interests me. There is something off about her, off about all of them really.**" Madara replied in a voice very different from the one he used for his Tobi persona. Pein and Konan shared a concerned glance. "**I sense they may lead us to what we came for.**" He dismissed them with a twitch of his tail and the two wondered into the kitchen.

"**Are you going to honestly let him dispose of them when the time comes?**" Konan whispered, in the silence.

"**If that is what it takes.**" Pein replied.

"**They are innocent.**" Konan said almost silently. Pein turned to look at her hunched form. There was something else going on. He bent down and rubbed his head against her's in a rare show of affection.

"**What is it?**" he questioned. She didn't meet his gaze.

"**They remind me of our family.**" She told them referring to when they'd been the Ame Orphans.

"**Oh, Konan.**" Pein sighed and suddenly became his normal self. "**We have to. To achieve Yahiko's dreams, to achieve our goals.**" Konan nodded and looked up her eyes fierce.

"**Of course Pein.**" She whispered and they went to find a place to sleep tails entwining together.


	3. Full Moon

**AN: Okay before any issues come up I'm listing everyone, who it really matter about's, ages now.**

**Hidan: 20**

**Deidara: 17**

**Itachi: 18**

**Niamh: 15, will be 16 in two months**

**Leslie: 18**

**Reagan: 19**

**Savannah: 20**

**Also any suggestions on pairings, if any?**

_**Niamh's POV**_

Niamh noticed the next day that the cats had split into groups, each set of two followed one of them around, while the remaining two Pain and Bella explored the house and tried to find away to get outside. Niamh couldn't help, but grin at the way they made sure to act like normal cats around her. Ayame and Stitches seemed to be her little stalkers, though the two didn't get along. She had to break up five fights between the two of them before breakfast was finished. When she went into her bedroom to finish one of the books that Seiko had given her, they trailed in after her. She'd barely given them a glance as she settled herself into a pile of pillows and wrapped the comforter around her to read. It wasn't until they'd gotten into, yet another fight that she decided to lay down some ground rules.

"Alright, alright," she snapped irritably, pulling Ayame from Stitches grasp. Stitches instantly backed down giving his fur an irritated lick. Ayame though bristled and hissed at him. If Niamh had to guess it sounded almost like he was cussing. She narrowed her eyes at the cat accusingly. "I said stop!" she hissed. Ayame went quiet, but turned to narrow his pink eyes at her. He mewed something at under his breath.

"Insult me all you like," she said casually causing him to give a nervous twitch and Stitches to glare at him accusingly. Ayame returned it with an 'it's not my fault' glare. Niamh set him down beside a placid Stitches.

"Alright you two, we all know you understand every word coming out of my mouth, don't act all innocent," she hissed as their eyes widened and they tried to play dumb. "I'm sure Pain told you not to, but that doesn't really matter right now." They shared a startled glance, which caused Niamh to roll her eyes. "You are way too obvious, now I'm going to speak to you plainly and you are going to follow my rules agreed." Stitches looked at Ayame a few minutes before turning back to Niamh and nodding.

"Good," Niamh said sitting down and crossing her legs. "Rule One: No fighting, especially near my old manuscripts and the easily breakable objects. Rule Two: No snooping through my things unless I say you can. And Rule Three: None of you will complain when I run a few tests." Niamh smirked at their reactions. Ayame puffed up and started hissing at her until Stitches muttered something under his breath. "You may go tell Pain my rules my special kitties, testing starts tomorrow." Stitches ran to the door, leaving Ayame to glare at her. Niamh rolled her eyes and went back to her book. Smart cats they may be, but cats nonetheless, nothing to be afraid of. Boy was she wrong.

… … … … … …

_**Savannah's POV**_

Savannah knew that Niamh thought something was off about their kittens, but she didn't see it. True their scent was a bit weird, but that's what had attracted her to her friends so why would it be bad in cats? Nemo and Marionette had started following her around. She couldn't help, but find them cute. Nemo would chatter a lot, but Marionette seemed lazy and looked like he was sleeping half the time. She also noticed that when they followed her into her room they kept giving her dirty looks, or rather the sketchbook she held dirty looks.

"Now, now," she scolded lightly, feeling a bit silly as she did. "Don't hate on my art kitties." They exchanged looks that she would have said was disgusted amusement on people, but on them it was just cute. "Fine then I guess I won't show you any of it." Marionette gave her a look that clearly said 'Oh please don't, once was enough' until Nemo mewed something at him and they reluctantly jumped up to look at her stuff.

"Alrighty, I suppose I'll start with the Naruto stuff." Savannah informed them starting with the three pictures that had offended them yesterday. Not realizing she was making them plot her murder as she did she began commentary. "Yes, SasoDei is always popular, despite Leslie's claims that it's a crime against nature for them not to be with Sakura, but most of the fangirls on campus, our College campus see, we're all going to school even Niamh, though she's a bit young, anyway the fangirls really like it." She turned the page to reveal a rather normal, meaning not embarrassing to them, drawing of Deidara with a clay spider in his hand and an evil grin. The cats relaxed a little glad to see the worst was over as she flipped through the book continuing her commentary. Savannah swore she saw Nemo laughing when she showed them a chibi Itachi getting hugged by a chibi Kisame and explained the whole ItaKisa pairing. Marionette kitty-smirked when she showed them some Konan/Pein ones that were always popular since everyone, even Leslie, were blatant supporters of said pairing. Finally she got into the pictures of just Itachi. Itachi sleeping, Itachi eating, Itachi drinking, Itachi shirtless, Itachi in Akatsuki gear, etc…. Savannah could actually feel the scarlet on her cheeks from the looks that even two _cats_ gave her at the collection.

"What?" she said defensively. Nemo prodded the sketchbook with a blatant kitty-smirk. "Oh, I'm not as bad as some people." Reagan, yes Reagan, and Leslie on some days. "Besides he's the only Akatsuki member I actually like, though Deidara and Sasori are okay. I love the whole art thing they have going…" And Savannah was off. Discussing the art of anime characters with attentive cats. What twenty year old does that in her spare time? She wondered. One without a love life, her mind supplied viciously.

… … … … … …

_**Leslie's POV**_

Leslie knew she should tell Niamh as soon as the phone call came, but she couldn't bring herself to. There had to be a way to keep that woman away from the house. She paced grumbling to herself as the cats watched her lazily. Bruce looked bored and Toboe looked relieved. Leslie had, funnily enough, found his nervous twitch came back when she talked fanfic ideas with him. Particularly ones that were Itachi or Sasuke pairings. But as much fun as she was having torturing the cats, only a little bit though, she did agree with Niamh that for lack of a better word they were weird, but considering the people she lived with that really wasn't a big deal. She could only imagine how the Leslie Ray Johnson of a year and a half ago would react to her current living situation. Leslie actually felt her lips quirk into a smirk. Oh yes she knew exactly how much her old self would hate it. And now of course bits of the past had to come back and slap her in the face. Sighing she decided since she had to talk to somebody the cats were her best bet.

"Alright kitties, I've got a problem, and no Toboe not a plot problem. Keep your fur on." She told the cat with a giggle as his fur bristled. "See I've got some personal problems." Both cats suddenly looked even more wary. They were getting asked by a teenage girl for advice. Oh how the mighty have fallen. "See we've had some problems in the past with certain…people, and now one of those people have shown up and I know it'll hurt Niamh to see her again, and I want to, you know, bundle her up and keep the bad things in the world away from her and all. Like any good older sibling." Toboe nodded his understanding, and Bruce looked torn between laughing and gaping at the girl. She was asking Itachi, who'd abandoned, scarred and beat up his little brother for advice on how to be a good sibling. Talk about screwed up. "So should I tell her or not." Toboe and Bruce mewed something at the same time and then glared at each other.

"Mew, mew mew meow," Toboe hissed. ("**Of course she shouldn't tell her, if that's what she thinks is best."**)

"Meows, rawr mew ow." Bruce hissed in reply. (**"Kid, deserves to know. Just because a certain someone wants their younger sibling to hate them, not to mention kill them doesn't mean it holds true for everyone."**)

"Right," Leslie sighed as the cats appeared to argue in front of her. "You can't talk, I'll just tell her then…" Leslie trailed off as the cats kept fighting. Wow, if you could put words to this they'd be cussing each other out.

… … … … … …

_**Akatsuki's POV**_

It had been a week since they'd moved in with the girls and none of them had found anything to blackmail them with. Pein was not pleased. True they knew more than they'd ever wanted to know about a bunch of teenage girls, except for Niamh, who turned out to not talk very much, but nothing Pein found interesting. Plus the tests were bothersome. It had started as simple puzzles to test their intelligence, then putting them in mazes, now she just messed with them getting Reagan and Leslie started on Naruto and observing which parts they started twitching at.

"**I swear I'm gonna kill the bitch!**" Hidan snarled as the girls started talking about Jashinism. Kakuzu looked up lazily.

"**As if you could, you're even smaller than Kisame.**" He pointed out. He'd been unhappy about being cooped up with what he considered his religious freak partner and about losing the bet with Zetsu who'd technically won. Hidan snarled and launched himself at Kakuzu. Konan who'd been trying to ignore there constant squabbling snapped. She gave a vicious snarl, that made them stop in their tracks and quickly hit them both sending them tumbling across the room. The other Akatsuki looked up a little fearful at what had caused the stoic woman's reaction.

"**You idiots! It's bad enough that we are trapped in these ridiculous bodies without you two making it worse with your whining! Now shut up or I'll rip out both your voice boxes!**" They remained silent and her eyes narrowed into blue slits. "**DO YOU UNDERSTAND?**" They nodded vigorously, looking a bit frightened. Konan turned with a disgusted huff her tail twitching violently. Hidan couldn't resist one parting.

"**PMS much,**" Nobody saw the first attack, but his screams pretty much told them how much it hurt. Afterwards Konan walked over to the couch with a satisfied air and settled down beside Pein clearly pleased with her work and sending one parting glare in Hidan's cursing direction. She unsheathed her claws in warning and he quickly shut up.

"**Wow Konan-san is scary,**" Tobi whispered fearfully cowering behind Deidara as they looked up at the female Akatsuki member with undisguised awe.

"**Yeah, un.**" Deidara agreed quietly, so only the male Akatsuki could hear his words. "**I always thought she was the weakest out of us, un. But man she can be vicious can't she, un?**" They all nodded their agreement looking up at Konan with newfound respect, and fear. Much fear. Hidan gave a groan of pain and Deidara snickered. The Jashinist glared up at him.

"**Laugh for now, just wait until the crazy bitch goes after you next.**" He hissed before falling back down. They didn't see Niamh, as always, until she was right there. She picked up Hidan with a smile and looked over his superficial wounds.

"Well at least now you know not to mess with an angry female." She pointed out cheerfully.

"**Bite me!**" he snarled, forgetting she couldn't understand him. Niamh chuckled and sat back on the couch, cuddling him to her chest.

"**This bickering is bothersome as Konan said. You all seem to forget what happens tonight.**" Pein growled glaring down at them from his higher up position. They all groaned. Tonight was the full moon, and as thankful as they were that they would be back in they're human forms, they'd still be stuck in a strange world with as far as they were concerned the craziest of the bunch and most sadistic, according to Hidan when the subject of Niamh was breeched. (Hypocrite…) Though that, as Deidara and Kisame pointed out, didn't stop him from curling up in her bed every night for the past week.

"Hey Niamh, Savannah," Reagan stated never tearing her eyes from the TV screen. Savannah glanced up from her drawing and Niamh, 'hnned', the noise causing the Akatsuki to look at her. They'd been shocked at first to hear Itachi's sound come from her lips, but had gotten used to it, though they still looked at her funny.

"You two still going out tonight?" she continued innocently. Niamh paused in the process of petting Hidan as she read a book. She looked up at Reagan suspiciously.

"Why?" she questioned.

"Oh, no reason," Reagan replied with shifty eyes and a crooked smile. They watched the conflict on the girl's face before she shook her head seeming to decide she didn't want to know.

"Right, break anything and you're paying for it, oh and don't forget to feed the cats." Niamh told her, when Reagan nodded she went back to her book, missing the smirks exchanged between Leslie and Reagan. The Akatsuki stiffened, both relieved and terrified about being left alone with the only true Narutards in the house, if you didn't count Savannah's mild infatuation with Itachi.

… … … … … …

_**Girl's POV**_

"Popcorn?"

"Check."

"Pop, half gallon, per person?"

"Check, Pepsi, check Mountain Dew."

"Assorted snacks, including Reece Pieces, Hershey's, Twix, etcetera?"

"Check, check, check, and check."

"Remote?"

"Check."

"Naruto season one in TV?"

"Check." Reagan said in a sing song voice, finishing the large list and causing Leslie to grin widely as she plopped down next to her on the bean bag.

"Excellent time for Naruto movie marathon!" she chirped out excitedly. "Bring on the violence." Reagan shushed her as the familiar theme started playing. They made it through the first three episodes, and bags of popcorn, in silence, before Leslie noticed something was missing.

"Hey, Ray?"

"Yeah?"

"Where's the cats?" Her answer was a scream, a loud crash and string of curses from upstairs. They both were up the stairs taking them two at a time before the screen fully paused.

… … … … … …

_**Akatsuki's POV**_

"**They're distracted**?" Pein questioned looking towards the puppet master who'd just entered the room. He gave a cat nod.

"**Yes they are watching…the show.**" He admitted shivering at the thought of himself being a fictional character as he took a seat next to his brat, not really looking him in the eye as they sat down. They hadn't since the incident the first day.

"**I still don't get why they had to f—king call it Naruto,**" Hidan whispered in disgust under his breath. "**We are way better**."

Tobi appeared beside Sasori and Deidara oblivious to the tension in the room. "**Tobi is going to miss being a kitty.**" The normally masked Akatsuki member admitted sounding a bit forlorn. "**It was really fun! All Tobi did all day was eat and sleep and play with Deidara-senpai and help Zetsu-san and watch Reagan-chan and play Ni-chan's fun games and…**" The orange tabby finally trailed off under the combined glare. Deidara, already frustrated, from not only his humiliation, but being unable to discuss who he found as the more annoying of the Akatsuki said the taboo words.

"**Tobi. Is. A. Bad. Boy. Un.**" He hissed quietly, causing the criminals to gasp. Tobi froze breathing hard and broke into keening sobs quickly running over to pout in an emo corner. Tobi was ashamed of himself, being a bad boy! Imagine! The others glared at Deidara bristling.

"**Oh f—king thanks Blondie, now we're going to have to deal with that for days until Konan convinces him he's a f—king good boy!**" Hidan snarled.

"**What the religious freak said!**" Kakuzu snarled in agreement.

"**Brat,**" Sasori hissed in agreement, voice dangerous.

"**Deidara.**" Kisame growled. "**Who do you think he comes to when he gets upset about you? Me that's who! It was bad enough putting up with the kid when I didn't have Itachi! Do you know how freaking annoying he is when he gets all emo about offending you or being a BAD BOY?!**" The shark approached fur bristling up eyes narrowed as a feral snarl broke form his throat.

"**Stop,**" Pein ordered as Deidara inched away. Pein glared at him. "**That means you too Deidara.**" He told the terrorist as he attempted to creep out the door.

"**We have to be ready for when we-**" Pein paused as there was a puff of smoke. "Turn back into humans." he finished coldly turning to watch a horrified Konan, who'd been going to leave the room when they transformed, grab the sheet to cover herself before anyone could blink and scream as she took in her nude coworkers. Hidan apparently finally realizing Kakuzu's earlier comment launched himself at him, not seeming to realize they were human again. Pein growled to himself as Hidan's curses filled the room and footsteps were heard rushing towards them. He was going to kill them later, he decided; kill every single one of them.

… … … … … …

_**Girl's POV**_

They both froze as they heard familiar voices. Leslie turned to stare at Reagan bug eyed, and they paused to listen, Leslie picking up a hard looking vase, not bothering to pour out the water and flowers as Reagan gripped her umbrella, picked up on the way up.

"Get off me Hidan, you stupid freak you're naked!" a male voice shrieked, amid a roar of laughter.

"Well, well Hidan, it seems you and Kakuzu were the ones hiding something, un." A familiar voice cackled. Leslie gasped giving a whimper of longing.

"SHUT THE F—K UP DEIDARA!" the angry Jashinist shouted in reply.

"Niamh always said the day would come when the cosplayers would break in to steal our supply. I just never expected it to be today." Reagan pointed out seriously eyes fierce.

"They aren't getting anything without a fight." Leslie replied with a snarl. She'd kill before she gave up her Akatsuki plushies with bonus Team Taka mini plushies.

"On the count of three," Reagan stated not noting the quiet that fell over the room.

"One, two, THREE!" she threw open the door to freeze seeing all the Akatsuki naked, covering themselves with various parts of her room. Itachi, she noticed for in a split second was hiding behind Kisame. Leslie took one look at them screamed bloody murder pointing towards Deidara's mouth, threw the vase at Hidan's head, and grabbed Konan and Reagan's hands before running from the room slamming the door behind her.

"Oh my god, oh my god," the blonde repeated leaning against the door that was muffling the startled curses. Reagan nodded in agreement looking up at the startled Konan, who had covered herself with a sheet.

"Why did you…?" she questioned amber eyes inquisitive. Reagan snorted as her and Leslie gave her the duh look.

"You are the only female with nine guys, some of which I hear are big perverts." Konan paused thoughtfully, thinking of Hidan and occasional Deidara, and shivering in horror as she tried to replace her fresh memories. Leslie and Reagan shared a look, neither of them were exactly, regretful of seeing the Akatsuki in their all together (Yes they are perverts), but could imagine Savannah and Niamh's reactions and weren't about to let them walk around naked. Reagan pushed Leslie off and swung it open.

"Cloths are in the closet, put something on you freakin nudists!" she shouted at them, and paused to stare at Tobi, cursing as she saw. "Stupid orange mask." She slammed it back in their surprised faces. Leslie looked up hopefully, but Reagan shook her head. And she was so hoping. A knock made them jump Leslie opened it to find a blushing Itachi standing there in a pair of baggy pants he'd unearthed.

"We are decent." He dead panned as the girls shared a predatory look, noting his bare chest. His eyes flickered across the hall. "Where's Konan-san?" Reagan shrugged.

"She probably went to get some cloths on." Leslie supplied, stepping passed Itachi, a smirk curving on her full lips, hungry look in her eyes as they fell on her two favorite characters.

"Hello Dei-kun, Sasori no Danna," she said silkily, eyes narrowing as she smirked at their horrified expressions. Reagan though growled pleasantly as her eyes locked on the half naked and slightly damp Jashinist. Itachi looked down concerned, realizing too late he'd just let in two rabid fangirls who were now eyeing their obsessions possessively.


	4. Let's Throw Water On Hidan!

**AN: Here you go, yet another chapter. Also one pairing is definitely decide, because I find it interesting. **

**Niamh/Hidan**

**Hope you like the chapter!**

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**Akatsuki's POV**

Sasori knew what was running through the girls' heads the moment those blue eyes fell on him and the brat and he did the only thing that was right. He sacrificed the brat to protect himself. When Leslie shot across the room towards them he grabbed a stunned Deidara, tripping him as he did, to unbalance him and swung him into the approaching girl. They tumbled down onto the ground, with a stunned yelp from Deidara and a squeal of utter joy from the other blonde. Leslie deftly pinned the stunned bomber to the ground shooting Sasori a thankful smile. He ignored the betrayed look his brat sent him he would have done the same thing if Tobi had been on hand.

Across the room Hidan starred down at the girl firmly attached to his waist with something a keen to horror. The others had always suspected he was something of a ladies' man on the side, something confirmed by Kakuzu's complaints and his own bragging, but right now they weren't so sure, especially with his reaction to the, if they were being honest, rather pretty girl that was holding him. He let loose a string of curses that even surprised Kakuzu, going as bright as a tomato and attempting to swing her off. The others sweat dropped at Deidara and Hidan's cries for help, Leslie's squeals of delight and Reagan's evil chuckling until Pein and Itachi decided to take pity on their fellow members. Itachi gave a loudly laughing Kisame one of his 'looks' and the blue man grabbed Leslie by her collar lifting her off the blonde bomber. The girl pouted but came without too much struggle, wrapping her arms and legs around the rather startled fish man instead. Reagan though only let go, snarling at them as she did, with the combined efforts of Itachi and Kakuzu. Finally they set the two girls in the middle of the room (after dislodging Leslie from Kisame) as Hidan and Deidara kept their distance acting as if they were venomous snakes not teenage girls, albeit teenage girls with glints in their eyes that would make most S-class criminals (including quite a few of the ones in the room) cower in fear.

"Now girls," Pein began using the voice he only used when a) Deidara had blown up/Hidan had sacrificed/Itachi had Tsukuyomied/Kisame had shredded to ribbons/etcetera somebody they weren't supposed to, b) one of them had used the taboo words around Tobi and he was annoying Pein/Konan about it, or c) he was threatening some weakling.

"Yes, Leader-sama?" Leslie asked sweetly, causing the Akatsuki to sweat drop.

"Yes, Konan's lover?" Reagan asked equally sweetly ignoring the newly dressed blushing Konan and death glare Pein sent her.

"Do you two know who we are?" he questioned. They all knew they did, but they needed to know to what extent. The answering smirks were not comforting.

"Oh, of course we do." Leslie said condescendingly. Pein's eyebrow twitched a little.

"And so does most of the population," Reagan chirped innocently.

"You are of course the Akatsuki," Leslie continued.

"Super powerful, S-class criminals."

"Most of you being main antagonist of the manga slash anime Naruto Shippuden, sequel to the series Naruto in, which only two of you appeared in, being Uchiha and Kisa-kun over their appeared in." Leslie further explained, fluttering her eyes at a surprised Kisame, who turned purple. He may have thought they were insane, and it was true, but he didn't get flirted with very often especially when his partner was nearby to distract the female population.

"Also, most of you are quite popular with the females of our world," Reagan pointed out slyly giving Hidan a lecherous look, which made the Jashinist glare at her.

"Right, like Dei-kun and Sasori no Danna!" Leslie chimed in pleasantly.

"Or Hi-chan." Reagan agreed with a smirk in the clearly displeased Jashinist.

"How much do you know about us?" Itachi questioned, seeing that Pein was barely containing his annoyance at the girls. The Uchiha couldn't help but thank all the gods that Konan was there to keep their leader's temper in check. Both girls smirked at him.

"Everything." Leslie informed him with a knowing glint in her blue eyes.

"Anything." Reagan drawled then also starring at him.

"Prove it, un." Deidara stated, speaking for the first time from his place half hidden behind Sasori.

"I highly doubt Nagato wants us spilling all of your secrets." Leslie pointed out sagely. Pein and Konan stiffened at the name, but the rest of the Akatsuki looked confused.

"Nagato?" Tobi questioned confused, or faking it rather.

"Or that Itachi wants us spilling all his secrets about the mini Uchiha also known as Emo Prince of Konoha." Reagan informed them darkly. Itachi narrowed his eyes at them, but the others gave mild chuckles at the nickname, until the Uchiha glared at the Mangekyo Sharingan spinning dangerously.

"How about meaningless facts that nobody would really know?" Kakuzu suggested watching the girls with wary pupiless green and red eyes. The girls exchanged thoughtfully looks, clearly having a silent conversation before nodding.

"Itachi likes sweets, Hidan hates vegetables and anything vegetarian, but loves spare ribs, you, Kakuzu-san like liver, Kisa-kun stands exactly 135 centimeters, and Tobi-kun likes to be called Good boy." Leslie told them thoughtfully. They looked at the Akatsuki members, who confirmed it with a nod giving them odd looks at their remembering random details.

"Pein and Konan are the two remaining members of the Ame Orphans, Zetsu eats people, and Deidara has a mouth on his chest that is used in his suicide technique and Sasori's from Sungakure where his grandmother, Granny Chiyo, still lives." Reagan informed them counting off the members on her fingers and looked up counting under her breath. "There that's something about all of you."

"I suppose you want an explanation to how we got here, correct?" Pein questioned calm again, though he'd twitched slightly at the Ame Orphan comment.

"Not really," Leslie told them. Reagan agreed.

"Why rationalize dreams?" she pointed out serenely. It took a few minutes for it to click. Hidan, predictably enough cursed, face palming.

"No wonder they're taking it so well, they think they're dreaming." Sasori said a bit relieved that these girls weren't _that_ suicidal that they'd act like this around S-class criminals.

"Not think," Leslie corrected.

"We are." Reagan finished. The intelligent members of the Akatsuki (All except Hidan, Tobi, and Deidara who were all muttering about things under their breath.) shared a long look. The males turned to Konan, clearly not wishing to get close enough to perform the needed duty. Konan glared at them, but went to the girls with a sigh. She pinched them both on the cheek and they started screaming.

"!" Leslie shrieked panting, eyes wide. They cringed away from the sound, Tobi actually covering his ears and whimpering.

"Oh my Jashin! Oh my freaking Jashin!" Reagan gasped. "They're freaking real! Oh my Jashin! I just freaking hugged the real Hidan! Oh my Jashin! I'm still alive! OH MY JASHIN!" They all shared a look as this continued for a few moments before the girls finally trailed off panting slightly and looking up at them sheepishly.

"Sorry," Leslie admitted weakly looking at Deidara repentantly. He huffed, but looked relieved. Hidan gave Reagan a pointed look. Reagan returned it with a most definitely unrepentant smirk. His glare got more heated and she laughed, giving him a 'you don't honestly expect me of all people to apologize' look. Leslie elbowed her friend, who turned away from Hidan with a huff, clearly wanting to continue harassing her favorite Jashinist.

"So, you gonna tell us how ya got here or not?" Reagan blurted out after a few minutes of silence. Leslie gave her friend a disgusted look.

"Isn't it obvious?" she questioned with a sneer. The Akatsuki looked at her surprised, Reagan though remained thoughtful.

"You don't think?" she questioned eyebrow raised, brown eyes amused.

"Of course I do." The blonde stated happily. Reagan eyed them skeptically, and shook her head.

"Furuba much," she told Pein derisively. Leslie nodded her agreement, while the Akatsuki watched their leader wide eyed, as he looked at the girls ready to kill. Konan stepped foreword hands raised her amber eyes wary. Pein growled as she pulled him back to whisper to him calmingly.

"Please explain your meaning." Itachi questioned stepping foreword, seeming to have decided to get them talking, while Pein was distracted.

"Oh, Furuba is an anime were these guys turn into animals." Leslie told him with an isn't-it-obvious tone. Reagan leaned back to look up at them from her seat on the floor.

"So you guys willingly become kittens or what?" They looked at the girls in shocked horror.

"How exactly did you figure it out?" Sasori asked, curious and reevaluating his decision of their intelligence. Itachi, who was in like mind watched them intensely and both were surprised when Hidan snorted.

"They didn't," he told them mockingly. "The red headed bitch told them or at least gave them the idea." The Akatsuki didn't see the punch coming until, Leslie had him pinned snarling on the ground.

"Leslie-san." Itachi began, signaling for Kisame to be prepared to hold Hidan back.

"What?" the girl growled pausing in the act of…messing up his hair? Itachi's eye brow twitched slightly, from his shrieking they'd thought she'd been doing something horrendous.

"Get the f—ker off me!" the Jashinist shrieked, writhing around in the girl's iron grasp. Leslie gave a mocking snort and her hands trailed down his chest to where the amulet hung. The occupants of the room's breaths caught. Hidan narrowed his eyes and Leslie smiled angelically as her hand stopped on his rosary.

"You wouldn't dare." He challenged.

"Wouldn't I?" she hissed. Reagan jumped up eyes fearful coming to stand beside Itachi obviously deciding to take the peace maker position since the Uchiha was frozen. All of them knew how protective Hidan was of his religion, but Reagan knew how possessive Leslie was of Niamh, it rivaled Itachi's devotion and Kakuzu and Hidan's temper when aroused.

"Alright, now let's just calm down before we do something we'll regret." She began, before sharing a look of understanding with Itachi. Kisame began to slowly creep around them surprisingly quiet for a super tall fish man.

"You heard him." Leslie pointed out stubbornly, the look in her eyes telling the others exactly how protective she was of her stepsister. Reagan nodded noting that Kisame was in place.

"Be that as it may, but it would be kind of pointless if he kills you-Kisame now!" Reagan shouted quickly pulling Leslie away with a yelp and Itachi's help. Kisame grabbed the irate, and surprise, surprise, cursing, Jashinist into a bone crushing embrace to prevent him from attacking the girl. Leslie blinked seeming surprised. She turned to Reagan confused.

"Did I really just…?" she questioned pointing towards Hidan.

"Yes, yes you did." Reagan told her calmly, pulling her further away from the angry man. "But considering he used the taboo I don't really blame you."

"Taboo, un?" Deidara questioned, pausing in his smirking at Hidan, before turning to the girls. Reagan nodded, looking pleasant, and to their surprise, sane.

"Yes, nobody, I mean _nobody _messes with Niamh or Leslie will whoop you." She explained sitting beside the fuming Leslie on the bed, who though still surprised by her own daring, threw Hidan a dark look. "Okay, we agree to take this like mature adults, not go all fangirl on you, and not insult Hidan's religion, if you all agree not to mention Niamh and act perfectly polite, like Uchiha." They nodded, including Pein and Konan, who'd finished talking.

"So you all came to our world disguised as kittens," They nodded. "Why?"

"Classified." Pein deadpanned. Leslie looked at Reagan and she nodded. Both of them decided to try and get it out of one of the others later.

"Right, well how long exactly will you be human?" Leslie questioned moving on to more important issues, like what would happen if Niamh and Savannah found out they were housing S-class criminals. Bad things, very bad things, she decided with a shiver.

"Until this morning." Pein answered, much to the Akatsuki's chagrin. The air went somber at these words as the Akatsuki's relatively good mood vanished.

"That bites," Reagan told them as sympathetic as she could be.

"Okay, so do you only turn back on the full moon?" Leslie questioned as Reagan seemed to be thinking hard, running her hands through her shoulder length spiky hair as she did.

"No," Pein stated after a few moments. The girls looked at him expectantly as he and Konan had a silent conversation with one look. With a nod from Konan he continued. "There is supposed to be a certain liquid that will stimulate the conversion. We're not sure what it is." The Akatsuki Leader admitted stiffly. Leslie nodded her eyes thoughtful.

"Do you think?" she questioned looking towards the other girl.

"Perhaps," Reagan agreed eyes distant.

"Ranma." Reagan nodded. Leslie stood and disappeared quickly. The Akatsuki turned to the girl who seemed to be deep in thought purposely ignoring them, Pein scowled. He did not find these girls' lack of respect very amusing. Reagan seemed to note his mood and take him seriously for the first time that evening.

"Don't worry we're just testing something." She told them.

"Testing what?" the Uchiha asked looking at the door as the shinobi heard a facet running and stopping. Reagan looked up at him her eyes focused and intelligent.

"We're starting with the basics, since the water in the vase was cool-" Konan interrupted getting her idea quickly.

"You're trying hot." The blue haired woman stated. The rest of the Akatsuki paused, they hadn't really been near water unless you counted a few drink and Sora's bathes.

"It could work," Pein admitted reluctantly as Leslie appeared in the room. She smiled at them and promptly tossed the water onto Hidan. He snarled.

"Why me?!" he shrieked glaring at her. "It's f—king hot!"

"You're already wet." Reagan explained examining his gleaming chest appreciatively.

"Well that didn't work," Leslie pointed out, not sounding disappointed in the least in fact she sounded rather eager. Reagan stood stretching slightly and sending them a smile.

"Come on time to start testing." The Akatsuki groaned, but didn't see much choice in the matter they did have to find out how to turn back at their leisure. But still they thought spending time with these girls was nothing short of torture. Well most of them. Konan found them funny and their femininity refreshing after spending years on end with Pein and the others. She loved Pein and tolerated the rest, but there was only so much testosterone someone could take.

… … … … … …

"Oh, stop glaring at me," Leslie told the now transformed Hidan as she scrubbed behind his ears. It was early in the morning and the Akatsuki were being bathed after many failures on Hidan.

"If it's anyone's fault it's Pein's," Reagan pointed out as she finished drying off a disgruntled Deidara, who'd also been volunteered, rather forcefully by Pein. "He's the one who picked you and Nemo, now don't look at me like that, we have to get back in the habit now that you won't be you for another month." Deidara huffed burying himself in the fluffy white towel to finish the parts she'd missed. Hidan hissed as Leslie began scrubbing underneath him.

"Oh, get over yourself Hi-Ayame, Nemo let me without a fuss." He continued to struggle, determined not to give into the indignity.

"What are you doing?" a familiar voice asked, causing them all to give shocked screeches. Standing in the door frame in a tank and red flannel pants was Niamh who watched them with amusement. Leslie sighed placing a sudsy hand over her heart.

"Oh, it's just you, are you trying to give me a heart attack?" the blonde grumbled irritated.

"No," Niamh told her with a smile stepping inside and smirking down at Hidan.

"Ayame giving you trouble?" Hidan glared at her as Leslie nodded. "Here give him to me."

"NO!" both girls shouted not wanting the Jashinist anywhere near the younger member of their household, but it was too late. Niamh had already taken the squirming Hidan from Leslie grip and flipped him over to scrub him clean.

"Honestly Niamh, we can do it." Leslie protested eyeing the hissing Akatsuki member turned kitten warily. Niamh threw her another amused look.

"Don't worry he'll behave," she assured her before giving Hidan a downright evil smile that would put Pein to shame. "Or he'll get a repeat of what happened last time he broke one of my rules." Hidan stiffened for second pink eyes going wide as he looked at her in a clear 'you wouldn't dare' manner. She chuckled. "You know I will so behave _or else_." Hidan submitted to her cleaning hissing under his breath the entire time. Niamh chuckled again oblivious to the startled looks the others in the room were giving her. Deidara had never, _never_, seen _anyone_, even Leader-sama at his scariest, get Hidan to obey so easily. But considering how dark the girl's voice had gotten at the end he wasn't surprised she had some attitude to back it up. Suddenly the, in his opinion, mildly pretty red head became the most interesting person in the house.

… … … … … …

**_Niamh's POV_**

Niamh couldn't help but grin at the placid Ayame in her lap and the incredulous looks Leslie and Reagan threw her. Honestly he was a bit unruly, but he was just a cat. She yawned and remembered how tired she was. She's gone to a concert of some singer Savannah liked, but the others couldn't stand and then had stayed up finishing Seiko's book. She was exhausted. Ayame looked up at her with an irritated gaze and gave a small kitty yawn of his own, and then looked angry at himself for doing it. Niamh scratched his ears causing him to give a startled purr and stood bringing the cat to her chest as she did.

"Ayame and I are going to sleep, good night, or morning anyway." She told the others who were giving the cat warning glares. If she wasn't mistaken he Kitty-smirked at them and snuggled closer. Leslie looked livid and Niamh had no idea why. She kept her smile on up until she closed the door. Once inside and away from the others it dropped and her shoulders drooped slightly. Stitches was already curled up on her extra pillow, opening one eye and giving her a mew of greeting as she lay down. Ayame quickly curled into the curve of her stomach as she got into a comfortable position.

Today had not been pleasant. Not in the least. Leslie had finally told her about her mother's phone call a few days ago, but she'd already known. Her stepfather had spoken to her on campus the day before, not that she'd told Leslie about her father's appearance. Leslie still hadn't forgiven the man or Lydia, Niamh's mother. Niamh truthfully never expected her to. Not that they'd ever forgive Leslie for messing with their plans. Niamh gave an unpleasant smile at her stepfather's proposal. He'd been more than eager to forgive her and get in her good graces, but his own child, never. He'd probably been under her mother's orders, she thought bitterly, her mother was always the one in charge sweeping the unpleasant things that didn't fit in her perfectly ordered world into the closet, like she'd once done Niamh, like she wanted to Leslie, now that this entire mess had happened. Niamh scowled feeling a pang of guilt at all that Leslie had been through to protect her.

She'd given up her life, her friends, and her family that had loved her to protect the freak that was tolerated because her mother had found use for her. Leslie had fought everyone who'd tried to go near Niamh, sued for emancipation and was now fighting for custody until Niamh became legal, broke off all ties to her own broth-

_Don't think of him._ Niamh shivered under her covers and Ayame looked up curiously snuggling closer. She smiled at the irritable cat. Stitches seemed to sense her mood and quickly came over curling up his head under her chin. She chuckled jostling the cat slightly.

"Sorry," she told him, but her smiled faded as her issues floated back in her mind. She swung an arm under her eyes pressing against her face tightly until she saw stars. "My family is so messed up." She heard a snort and looked down to find Ayame giving her a 'yeah right' look. She smiled slightly.

"Yeah you think Les is bad, you should meet the others, they make Les look like the poster for mental health." Ayame's eyes widened at the thought of someone being worse than Leslie. Niamh chuckled until Stitches gave a mew of protest, glaring at her with one open eye. She smiled repentantly and he closed it with a huff. "Come here you." She told the white cat pulling him to snuggle into her chest, right under Stitches. The two glared at each other bristling.

"None of that now." She scolded. "I need both of my boys right now." They shared a look at her miserable tone. And relaxed, Stitches rubbing his head against her cheek and Ayame snuggled against her. Niamh sighed closing her eyes and feeling a bit better with her two favorite kittens snuggled with her. Soon they all drifted into a peaceful sleep. One upset teenage girl and two dangerous S-Class criminals.


	5. Ramen! or Tobi Meets the Cops

**AN: Wow longest chapter yet! Almost as long is not as long as some of my** _Ultimatum in Blood_ **chapters.**

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_**Niamh's POV**_

The red head looked down surprised to find the pure white cat bumping into her ankles. She smiled indulgently at him as he narrowed his odd eyes at her accusingly. Ayame and Stitches were never happy about her leaving, most of the time they watched her go enviously from the window. The past few days though, Ayame had developed a bit of cabin fever it seemed. He'd taken to trying to fight any of the cats that got to close to him and had even gone so far as to hiss at Pain (before realizing what he'd done and running off to hide in Niamh's bed). He's almost human grumblings had gotten so bad she'd been forced to sneak out of her own room, while he was sleeping. She was all for letting the cats out for a bit, but Leslie and Reagan seemed to think some great calamity would befall them if they did. Niamh had only rolled her eyes at the overreactions they were just cats they couldn't do anything that bad. Right now he looked like a mother who'd found her daughter attempting to sneak out.

"Okay we both know you want to go out, right?" Ayame gave her a cat nod and watched her with that intense look that always unnerved her at the pure human like focus and understanding. "But listen I can't take you. Les and Ray would flip out." He's eyes narrowed for a few seconds before he hung his head kitty shoulders slumping, those sweet pink eyes of his looking at her betrayed. Niamh bit her lip, dirty, cheating, copy cat had learned it from Tobi. He knew she couldn't resist puppy dog, or in this case kitty cat, eyes. Niamh sighed pausing to listen to the silent house. Savannah's classes didn't start for awhile and Reagan and Leslie had free days so they'd be sleeping late. "Alright, get in, but if Leslie or Reagan catches us I say you snuck in got it?" he nodded pink eyes smug as he slid into her bag. Why did she feel like she was going to regret this?

… … … … … …

_**Reagan's POV**_

Reagan had nothing against Zetsu personally, in fact he was one of her favorite characters, right up there with Hidan, and probably would have been in the top three if it wasn't for his whole cannibalism problem. She didn't even hate Tobi. Madara? Yes, oh, yes. But the cute, hyper little Tobi? Who in their right minds could resist him? What she did hate however was them following her everywhere and getting her in trouble with her manager. She glared down at the two soaked bundles of fur gritting her teeth. How freakin' fantabulous.

"Store room, now." She growled, the little orange tabby gave her a pair of puppy dog eyes that had convinced even Niamh to sneak him a bite of food, and Reagan relented a little. "It's just for a little while, if you behave I'll give you some cake when we get home." Tobi perked up and Zetsu strutted behind him having a hissed argument with himself, or at least she assumed that's what he was saying.

Reagan bent down to clean up the glass fragments that used to be water jugs, muttering mutinously under her breath. She'd come in to pull an early shift today, only to have her little stalkers follow her to work. She hadn't really minded and neither had anybody else, in fact the customers had swarmed like flies thinks to the S-Class criminals cute factor even forgetting to glare daggers at their owner whom most was convinced was a Satanist and/or witch. Her manager, ironically enough, named Tobi, had approved and let her keep them there, that is until Tobi the cat had annoyed Zetsu so much the former plant man that had shoved him into the nearest glass object aka the water jug, soaking them both and getting her in trouble. Reagan continued her mutterings, which mostly consisted of phrases like 'stupid lollipop men' and 'damn schizophrenic plant cannibals'. Needless to say her customers seemed to think she was even more crazy then usual. Reagan sighed in defeat as two o'clock rolled around and the perky blonde pixie, who surprisingly enough worshipped the ground she walked on, sort of like a blonde female version of Tobi with Deidara, showed up. She was just putting her uniform up in the work room when a familiar poof sounded from the store room. It was just like the fanfictions described it. _No freakin' way!_ Her panicked mind protested as she quickly ran to the room to find Tobi wearing two aprons, one tied in the front the other in the back and Zetsu half hidden in the wall.

"What did you touch!" the girl instantly shrieked at Tobi. She was pretty sure the masked man pouted.

"Tobi didn't do anything Reagan-san! Tobi is a good boy!" he protested sounding upset. Ignoring the murderous, traitorous, S-Class criminal who was claiming he was a good boy she turned to Zetsu.

"It appears they've found a way to change us back. When one of us transforms back all of us do." Reagan face palmed growling.

"This would have been good to know before hand!" she snapped. Zetsu shrugged clearly not caring.

"Leader-sama didn't mention it** so why should I**?" Reagan snarled at him.

"Pein is so dead when I get a hold of him, or when Konan does anyway, I am _so_ telling." Reagan told them, before giving them a put upon sigh. "Stay here I'll get you some pants." With that she disappeared to steal some sweats from Anthony, her friend and co-worker. Tobi slipped the on while she had her back turned, when she turned back Zetsu was beside him wearing a trench coat. Reagan twitched, he looked like a mutant flasher.

"I'm not gonna ask where you got that, but you think you can get home by yourself, _without being seen_?" she questioned, he nodded.

"Why exactly can't we come with you? **You not like us or something bitch?** I'm sure that's not it. **She's still not taking us.** Let's let her explain first." He said talking to himself. Reagan felt her eye twitch slightly, but decided it would be best, and more conducive to a long life, if she answered.

"You're fly trap thing won't fit in my car." Both sides of him looked thoughtfully before he left.

"Okay come on Tobi," Reagan stated turning to look at the masked man, who was still wearing the aprons and now some black sweats to complete the ensemble. Checking to make sure the others were distracted she quickly pushed him through the back door.

"Okay now make a run for-" she began.

"Yo," a familiar voice said behind her. Reagan jumped with a shriek to find Anthony standing beside her, arms hanging loosely by his side, one hand shoved in his jean pocket. His blue eyes were amused as he smirked at her pushing his messy white hair out of his face.

"Why's the cosplayer wearing my pants?" he questioned.

"You find me with a half naked masked guy sneaking out of work and all you're concerned with is your sweats?" she asked. Her answer was a wolfish grin.

"Yeah, oh, Maeron wanted me to invite you to the Ostara ritual next month." Anthony told her, referring to the head priestess of the coven in town. Reagan nodded pushing Tobi away and shooing Anthony.

"Yes, that's nice, but really we have to go." Reagan told him firmly as Anthony trailed behind them wearing that infuriating smirk of his.

"Really Ray-ray, you honestly don't think I'm going to ask questions?" he asked eyebrow raised.

"Too late, only one question per day, you know the rules," Reagan told him wiggling her finger at him as she referred to their childhood game. He gave her another wolf grin and laughed, shaking his head slightly.

"Fine, but you'll be seeing me soon. I have to say hi to that pretty little red head landlord of yours." He called over his shoulder as he walked away. Reagan scowled.

"Pervert!" she called.

"You say pervert I say…admirer of fine art!" he called back slamming the door behind him. Reagan shook her head as she pushed a startled Tobi in the passenger seat.

"How do you think the others are doing?" the masked man asked concerned. Reagan shrugged giving him a side long glance. Was he really the super evil Uchiha Madara? The girl shrugged it off, moving her lip ring with her tongue a thoughtful expression on her face. How were the others?

… … … … … …

_**Niamh's POV**_

Niamh nearly growled at her annoyance, in the form of the slight olive-skinned, green eyed, black messy haired form of Xavier. The boy was one of the three certified child geniuses that went to this campus, the other being Seiko, who was watching them brown eyes wide, her mouth in a 'O' making her look like a little bird with her tiny frame and features. The only thing large about her was her almost manga like big brown doe eyes. Ayame, who had forced himself into her hoodie, had no qualms snarling at the glaring boy.

They were in the research room assigned to them by the administration under the agreement that they'd help with any experiments and give guest lectures in return for full paid scholarships, Niamh had just happened to wrestle free rides for her house mates, much to Xavier's disgust, and Seiko's awe. The two others were quite different from her.

Xavier was an arrogant boy from a wealthy family, who'd been picked on since he was little and neglected by his parents. Because of this he'd developed a rather antisocial and prickly personality. Niamh usually could be patient with him, but sometimes the boy just grated on her nerves. But under that exterior he was relatively bearable and honestly quite shy and self-conscious. Niamh knew she was his only friend beside Seiko and knew that he'd suspected she was doing it out of pity, to her great annoyance. Sure she'd be nice to the guy out of pity, but she wouldn't willingly force her time on someone because of it. Because as much as he annoyed her sometimes, he still was a good friend and rather understanding about her family issues having gone through a few of his own.

Seiko on the other hand was a quiet, shy, sweet, little thing, rather like Savannah only freakishly intelligent and a lot less confident. She'd been raised by two middle class parents, who's had no idea what to do with a daughter as intelligent as her, but had loved her all the same and worked hard to give her the opportunities Niamh and Xavier had been given more easily. The girl also had a naivety that Xavier and Niamh lacked, and both of them had taken on the rolls of her big siblings/protectors from the perverts and jerks on campus who'd mess with the timid girl.

"Ayame stays." Niamh informed the irratible boy.

"He'll get in the way." The boy argued, shooting the cat a dirty look. Niamh rolled her eyes as the boy unconsciously rubbed the hand where the cat had smacked him moments before.

"No, he won't," Niamh defended, narrowing her eyes at him.

"Of course he won't," Xavier echoed sarcastically, his eyes mocking.

"P-please don't fight," Seiko stuttered out eyes worried. "Please let Aya-chan, stay Xavier-nii-sama. Niamh-onee-sama and I will make sure he doesn't bother you." The girl pleaded. Xavier frowned sharing a look with Niamh. Both of them knew he couldn't resist Seiko's puppy dog eyes. Niamh resisted a smirk as the boy growled his consent. Ayame hissed something quietly. Niamh patted his head, in warning as much as in affection. The animal glared at the boy before settling itself in the girl's clothing.

"Hey Niamh," Xavier called a few minutes later. Niamh looked up, a bit annoyed from being interrupted. "Could you get me Kelli Oscar from the Drama Department?" Niamh raised an eyebrow at the blush faintly painting his cheeks. It was a badly kept secret that he had a crush on Klutzy Kelli, the pride of the drama department. Niamh smirked at him looking over at Seiko to see if she'd noticed his request. She hadn't, instead she was deeply immersed in an ancient scroll written in Japanese.

"Of course I will Xavier." Niamh replied smoothly, ignoring the glare. "I'm sure _Kelli_ will be so excited to see you." Xavier growled. Niamh winked at him chuckling softly.

"Just wait until you like someone Niamh, I will never let you live it down." He muttered more to himself than her. Niamh though heard it and chuckled. Her like someone? Not likely.

… … … … … …

_**Reagan's POV**_

Reagan growled irritably as she pulled into the gas station. She just had to be running on fumes, today of all days. Tobi looked up curiously as she pulled next to the pump. Reagan stuck her head out and noting that nobody was there decided to risk it. It would make them leave faster.

"Alright Tobi, I'm going to get us some gas, watch these numbers when this," she pointed to the numbers on the tank, "Gets to fifty you remove the pump and screw the lid back on. Remember you have to twist to the right. Righty tighty, lefty loosey. I'll be back after I pay. Do not wonder off just watch the numbers." Reagan ordered. Tobi nodded vigorously.

"Hai, Reagan-san. Tobi will do as you say. Righty tighty, lefty loosey." He repeated starring intently at the numbers. Reagan sighed not feeling all together comfortable leaving him with her precious car. Ah well, he's really the mastermind of the whole evil people he has to have a brain _somewhere_. She felt the snarl grow in her throat when she saw who was at the cash register. It was Michael Davis. He had been her first boy friend, and a member of her parents' church, before she'd come out and told everyone she was converting to the Craft, then he'd joined in on her parents campaign to convert her back the Christianity. When they'd failed horribly, they declared her a Satanist and kicked her out during her junior year of high school. Soon afterwards she'd met Leslie, who'd formally been the preppiest, must annoying person she'd ever met. Reagan had nothing against cheerleaders, but Leslie had been the epitome of all the bad things you heard about them. But that year she'd changed, because of all the crap with her family. Reagan shivered at the thought, and she'd thought her parents were bad. The girls had become best friends and Reagan had been invited to move in to Niamh's grandmother's house when the old woman died. Soon afterwards they'd found Savannah, barely paying the bills in her small apartment and adopted her in their make shift family. Reagan hadn't forgiven her parents, though she was still in contact with her little brother, Jared, and less conservative cousins. She'd also never forgiven Michael who'd abandoned her in her time of need. He'd never forgiven her, seeing her change of religion as betrayal. To say the least they weren't on good terms.

"Well, well if it isn't the heathen." He purred, Reagan allowed the snarl she'd been holding to pass through her lips. She'd long ago decided if he was going to think badly of her she'd give him a reason to. The boy, he was not a man no matter how grown up his body was, shivered.

"Hello _Mikey_," she replied, knowing how much he hated the nickname, that she'd always called him, back when she'd been the only person in the world allowed to call him it. The former sign of affection was now just a show of hostility and that in itself saddened her to see how far their relationship had fallen.

"Shut up," he snapped. Reagan gave him a mocking smile and slammed the fifty on the counter making him jump away from her violently.

"Here's you money Mikey, hurry up and take it so I can leave." She snapped in reply, smirking at how he reluctantly touched it, as if it was infected with some disease.

"What worried the Craft is catching?" she mocked and mentally winced. She knew it wasn't wise to antagonize someone. After all the rules of Wicca stated that what ever you gave came back on you times three, good or ill. She was definitely throwing off a lot of ill intent.

"Just go you traitor," he growled and then looked behind her. His lip curled into a sneer eyes twinkling evilly. "Looks like your little friend needs some help." Reagan turned around and let off a few curse words that would have impressed Hidan. Tobi was standing beside her car. With some cops. Looks like the threefold law had hit her, and it hit hard.

… … … … … …

_**Leslie's POV Earlier that day…**_

Leslie was bored, nothing could hold her interest for long. Not Naruto, not the fact that her cats were Akatsuki members (it had gotten old after a while), nothing. She lazily glanced over at Savannah to see what the girl was doing. Not surprisingly she was bent over her sketchbook focused, clutching the charcoal in her hand in a tight grip. Deidara and Sasori were watching as she did, clearly curious about it. Considering they weren't having panic attacks or pointedly not looking at each other, something they'd only recently regained the ability to do she was pretty sure Savannah wasn't drawing anything related to them.

"So what you drawing Savvy?" the blonde questioned moving slightly and ignoring the glare Itachi sent her, he'd been using her as a bed.

"Itachi," she answered plainly. Leslie rolled her eyes.

"And…?" she questioned.

"Kisame." Was her curt reply.

"And what are they doing?" Leslie continued amused by the way the Uchiha stiffened and Kisame shoved his head under the pillows covering his ears with his paws.

"It's Itachi as a kid, and Kisame as a teenager. Kisame is painting Itachi's nails, while Itachi eats dango." Leslie sighed disappointed by the lack of material to torture the Uchiha with. He glared at her as if sensing her thoughts. Deidara kitty snickered.

"Right, I think it's time for lunch." The girl decided, picking up the Uchiha and racing towards the kitchen.

"Ramen on the stove!" Savannah shouted behind her.

"Yeah, yeah," Leslie called before the door shut muffling the sound in the living room. The girl put the Uchiha down as she began filling a bowl, humming to herself. She could feel the glare and killing intent wafting off him. She smirked.

"You know that only works when you're human and have the Sharingan to back it up, and, no, Kitty-Sharingan isn't scary." She mocked as his eyes turned red and black. She heard a kitty chuckle behind her and turned sharply to find Kisame sitting at the door. She opened her mouth to greet him, stepping foreword as she did, only to find a kitten entwining itself in her feet. She screamed as she fell foreword, mentally cursing Uchihas as the bowl slipped from her fingers. She hit the floor with a thud, quickly followed by the sound of a bowl hitting moments later. She only had a moment to be thankfully she hadn't chosen a glass one, before a sudden pop was heard and she found herself starring at blue feet.

"Hn, so am I scary now?" a voice whispered behind her darkly, only to be drowned out from a loud shriek in the living room. _Oh crap._

… … … … … …

_**Reagan's POV**_

Reagan almost didn't swing open the door in time as she rushed towards Tobi. The masked man sounded like he was sobbing across the parking lot. The officers looked uncomfortable exchanging nervous looks at the oddly dressed, childish adult in front of them. Reagan was both relieved and horrified at who was there. It was Steve Miller and Joseph Hughes. Miller was decent, and Hughes was his newbie partner, who would listen to him. Plus Miller had known her since she was little. Bad side Miller had known her since she was little and knew very well who was to blame for the sudden popularity in cosplaying and anime and manga in general. There was a reason the town had gained the nickname Anime Central.

"Tobi is a good boy! Tobi didn't do anything bad! Reagan-san!" the masked man called spotting her and lunging to grab her around the waist. "Reagan-san the bad men are being mean to Tobi and saying he did something wrong! But Tobi's a good boy!" Miller smiled at her and Hughes looked confused.

"I should have known he was one of yours Ray, you always did attract the odd ones." The man teased with a warm smile Reagan returned patting Tobi's head comfortingly.

"I suppose you're one of the odd ones Old Man?" she teased back. He laughed ruffling her hair. Hughes relaxed and gave her a searching look clearly trying to place her.

"So how's Anne?" Reagan questioned. Miller's smile widened and Hughes groaned.

"My beautiful wife is pregnant once more!" he declared proudly, practically glowing. Hughes threw her a dirty look, causing the girl to smirk. The passed three times Anne had been pregnant if you said anything even remotely related to pregnancy, his wife, or babies, Miller would talk your ear off about baby names, plans for the nursery, and ultra sounds. That obviously hadn't changed.

"Congratulations!" Reagan told him with a smile. Tobi looked up at Miller suspiciously from his place cowering behind Reagan, even though he was taller than her.

"Wonderful I know!" he told her with a wide grin eyes drifting up to Tobi and suddenly becoming serious.

"We stopped to talk to your friend here and he sorta panicked, started ranting about being a good boy and stuff." Miller told her. Reagan grimaced.

"Sorry, Tobi's…special." Reagan said lamely. Miller nodded understandingly.

"We figured, especially when he bit Hughes when he tried to take off the mask, didn't even glimpse his face though." Miller told her clearly impressed. Reagan glared at Tobi.

"Sorry, Reagan-san," he told her repentantly.

"Don't apologize to me, apologize to Hughes." The girl scolded scowling. Tobi looked over at the young man reluctantly, clearly not liking him.

"Sorry Hughes-san." He told him, before muttering under his breath, "But only because Reagan-san says I have to." Reagan elbowed him relieved Hughes hadn't heard, Miller, though seemed amused by the comment.

"I like this one Ray, even if he is a little special. He's a keeper or at least a lot better than the _last_ one." He told her throwing Michael a dirty look and causing the girl to blush. Tobi was of course confused.

"Wait a second now I remember. You're Reagan Holster, you're one of the girls who introduced anime and manga." Hughes muttered looking down at her horrified. She smiled mischievously.

"It's your fault." The man growled. Reagan blinked up innocently.

"What is?"

"Do you know how bad it is when a grown man knows more about anime than his kids do, and they come to me to ask if the spoilers they hear at school are true? And how 'bout the fact that not only do I know every Sailor Moon girl's name, but her voice actor's name in subbed and dubbed, their blood type, when they become a scout, and their powers?! Hell, I'm disturbed by the fact I even now what Yaoi and Yuri is!" the man ranted. Miller burst out laughing clapping the man's back, and making the smaller man stumble, miller was a big guy.

"Now, Hughes, remember who it is that keeps the cosplayers and anime freaks under control in this town. Before Ray here and her friend Leslie got them under control, it was utter chaos for us." Hughes gave him a skeptical look. "Yes, it was. You hadn't joined yet, so you wouldn't remember. But man do I do, you should be thankful for this girl." Hughes looked down, and Reagan smiled, imagining what he saw. A girl dressed in a long white skirt with different colored scarves tied around her waist as belts, with a black corset worn over a tunic style white shirt, with a triquetra hanging from a silver chain, with short spiky black hair and a lip and nose piercing, the girl also looked up at him with clear hazel eyes trying to look trust worthy, but failing mischeif in her eyes.

"It was nice talking to you I need to get Tobi home." She told them after an awkward silence. Shoving the masked man into the passenger seat, she quickly drove away. She was so killing Leslie when she got home.

… … … … … …

_**Leslie's POV**_

Leslie quickly jumped to her feet running passed the naked Kisame to find Savannah screaming her head off eyes covered as Deidara and Sasori took refuge behind the couch from the pieces of furniture she was tossing at them. Seeing her pick up season one of Naruto Leslie dove across the room knocking her to the ground.

"Oh my god, oh my god, they're real!" Savannah shrieked eyes wide. Leslie nodded forcibly taking the Naruto DVD from her hands and cuddling it to her chest as she stroked it protectively.

"Yes, yes they are." Leslie told her absently. Savannah's face suddenly went a curious shade of red.

"Oh my god I just saw…" her eyes were as wide as saucers as she through a quick glance at Deidara and Sasori going a shade of red several times darker. Leslie was impressed by the color.

"Anything interesting to report." The girl teased grinning lopsidedly. Savannah looked away muttering something under her breath. "What was that?" Leslie questioned curious.

"Sasori's not a puppet yet." She whispered barely audible, thought the shinobi still heard.

"Hm, so I go through with it," the puppeteer remarked curious. "And it works." Deidara gave his Danna a disgusted look before turning to examine the girl Leslie had pinned to the ground who refused to look at him.

"Well, well, that is interesting." Leslie said leering in his direction. "Right, well sit up I've got a lot to tell you." She paused when she heard a car in the driveway. "Oh sounds like Leslie is here." Sure enough the girl threw open the door moments later, followed by a talkative Tobi and Zetsu wearing a trench coat. "There are more cloths in the attic!" she called as the Akatsuki rushed off to find their leader. The girls quickly explained the situation to Savannah and by the time the Akatsuki were back (fully clothes now, though Zetsu still insisted on the trench coat, which he kept open to reveal a pair of jeans.) she'd calmed down some.

"So the Akatsuki were our cats." They nodded. "And apparently ramen turns them back into people." They nodded again, though Reagan snickered before she did. Savannah blinked looking up at the gathered shinobi. "Niamh's going to have a heart attack when she finds out."

"Technically she never needs to know." Leslie argued, shivering in horror at the thought of Niamh's reaction.

"Or at least not anytime soon." Reagan chimed in. Savannah looked troubled.

"But-"

"Do you want us to die Savvy?" Reagan asked peering at the girl with a pout. "Because you know what her reaction's gonna be." Savannah still looked troubled, but nodded her consent.

"So we all agree not to tell Niamh anything until we have to?" the girls nodded, and Leslie sighed with relief.

"Now what do we all agree not to tell Niamh?" a cold voice asked behind them they all jumped with a shriek turning to find a very angry red head glaring at them. Oh crap, they were so screwed.


	6. Hidan Robs the Drama Department!

**AN: Sorry about the shortness, promise the next one will be longer, this one focus on Hidan and Niamh. Enjoy! Oh, sorry 'bout the weak ending.**

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**__**Niamh's POV, Drama Department, Earlier… **_

Kelli Oscar was a nice girl, she really was, but she had absolutely no taste in men. After all she had dated Michael, Reagan's ex recently. Well before Ray gave her a talk and she'd realized how bad Michael was. Her current one was even worse. Zack Thompson was an annoying brat, who not only liked to tease Seiko, but seemed to be absolutely _fascinated_ with Savannah, despite the fact he had a girlfriend. This did not endear him to Niamh, and apparently the others agreed.

"Thompson's an ass." Harley, Kelli's understudy, told her glaring at him at where the boy was talking to the younger girl. The others nodded their agreement throwing the boy dark looks. Niamh muttered something that could have been agreement looking around curiously. She always did like the people here. They were friendly and seemed to like her. Occasionally they'd even invited her to sit with them at lunch back in her one year high school experience.

"So what's with the cat, Lovie?" Reese asked throwing an arm around Harley's shoulder as she peered at Ayame curiously.

"Belated birthday gift." She explained. Reese raised an eyebrow.

"Isn't your birthday in May?" Niamh smiled at her skeptical tone.

"_Really_ belated birthday gift." Niamh corrected.

"Oh, of course." Reese drawled out laughter in her eyes. She turned to Harley, ruffling the girl's short dirty blonde spikes playfully. "Come on Davidson, time to get to work, leave Lovie to her mission of prying Kel-kel from Beast's jaws." Harley rolled her eyes.

"Reese says their relationship is like Beauty and the Beast only in this case the beast isn't a lovable fluffy monster." She whispered to her quickly before Reese dragged her away long orange colored hair that she'd got her name from fluttering behind her.

"TURN OFF THAT FAN GREG!" Reese shouted glaring at the boy as she dragged Harley away. The brunette boy chuckled and did, giving Niamh a friendly wave before disappearing. Niamh almost grimaced as Kelli finally came over to her, unfortunately followed by her boyfriend, Beast aka Zack.

… … … … … …

Niamh growled out loud as she bumped into, yet another thing in the dim storage room of the drama department. Kelli had told her that she couldn't go until they finished rehearsal today and now that they had they had turned off most of the lights and were on their way back when Kelli remembered she'd left her purse in the room when she'd put up her costume. (It had been a dress rehearsal.) Deciding it would be quicker, and less of a safety hazard, Niamh had volunteered to go back for it sending Kelli on her way. Now she was stuck in the dark, lit only by the light she could tempt in through the open door with a cat snickering every time she ran into something. Niamh threw Ayame a dirty look, before turning to glare evilly at the crate her knee had hit. Leslie and Reagan teasingly called it her Sasuke-glare claiming she was even better than him at glaring at poor inanimate objects when she was annoyed. Niamh though got a lucky when something on top of the crate fell over. When it hit it sounded like a bead purse. Niamh grinned leaning over the crate.

It took her a few seconds, but eventually her eyes adjusted in the dark and she could make out the lumpy shape of a faintly violet bead purse stuck between some old set props and the crate it was a tight fit, but Niamh managed to wiggle the top half of her body into the hole and stick her arm out finger tips barely brushing the purse. Suddenly she heard a kitty snicker as two of her fingers curled around the strap. She turned up to find Ayame looking down at her pink eyes shinning brightly in the dark examining her back intently. Niamh growled both from the fact that her face was now shoved against the card board moon and because the fact her shirt had fallen down in the back. Ayame gave another kitty snort and hopped off the crate to explore. Niamh growled again muttering under her breath about stupid cats as she got a tighter grip on the accessory. With a triumphant grip Niamh pried herself from the tight embrace of the crate and moon allowing the purse to flop in her lap in time to hear a loud pop behind her.

"If you've broken anything I swear I'll-" she began to threaten the cat only to freeze at the sight that greeted her eyes. It was most definitely Ayame. Or feline. A male sure. Just a human one. A naked one at that.

… … … … … …

_**Hidan's POV**_

Hidan glared at the red head in front of him who just starred mouth opened slightly. What the f—k was wrong with her he wondered. Her brown eyes widened even more as she looked him over. He felt his eyebrow twitch in annoyance.

_Wait eyebrow?_ He's startled mind was asking as he opened his mouth to mew at her. "What you lookin' at bitch?" But instead of the girly kitty voice he'd gotten accustomed to, it was very deep, very human-_Oh shit_-Hidan's own voice. He only had a few seconds to realize he was human again, before Niamh's expression distracted him. Her pupils dilated and her face was simultaneously blushing and paling. Before he could as much as blink she was sailing out the door practically reeking of terror.

"Well, damn." He muttered, looking around the room and grabbing the first thing his hands touched to pull on. It was a pair of black leather pants (sort of like Mello's from Death Note) and a white long sleeve, that had a deep V revealing most of his chest, it reminded him of those romance novels he'd caught Niamh looking at a few days ago. The girl had blushed at being caught, muttering something about seeing what Leslie, Reagan, and Savannah found so fascinating about them. The next second Hidan was out the door chasing down the surprisingly fast girl. It had only taken him a few seconds, but she was already almost to the stage, which gave the hall its minimal lighting. Hidan sped off after her yelling the entire time.

"Slow down dammit!" he shouted, she sped up of course. _Damn girl needs to-_ this train of thought broke abruptly when he ran into something he couldn't identify in the dark. Cursing he looked up to see Niamh run onto the stage and decided playtime was over.

… … … … … …

_**Niamh's POV**_

Niamh wasn't sure what was worse, the fact that he was naked or the fact that his entire body, and she saw all of it, screamed dangerous. His eyes flickered with a deadly light as his words came out clipped and angry in a very deep, surprisingly seductive voice, despite the coarse words.

"What you lookin' at bitch?" he questioned with growl. She felt her face warm as her heat abruptly jumped in her throat. _Run_, her mind told her, as she flashed back in her mind to another night, with a different guy who'd she'd felt the same instinctive wariness of, but ignored. Before she could fully comprehend what she was doing she was running down the hall. She heard him behind her, but she was ahead and nobody had ever caught her when she ran from them before. She heard him hit something and fall just as she sprinted out onto the stage. She could see the open door just passed the chairs and freedom! Or at least she thought so before a hand shoot out and grabbed her hood in its grasp yanking her back. With a startled yelp she was pulled into a newly dressed, she sent a thank you heavenward for small mercies, chest.

Niamh did the only thing she could think of she started struggling and kicking and clawing at any skin she could touch. He wasn't too affected, in fact, the bastard laughed. Well until one of her flailing legs struck him…somewhere. As she wished his arms loosened slightly, unfortunately, what she did not plan for was him falling on top of her. The only thing she managed before they fell in their heap was a startled squeak that wasn't getting anybody's attention.

One thing she learned as soon as he hit the ground was he was bigger than she thought, or she was smaller than she cared to admit. Because as she sucked in a breath to give a last ditch effort in a scream to hopefully bring people running he covered her mouth and turned her to face him placing both his arms beside her head. She couldn't see anything, even out of the corner of her eyes, but him. And man was there a lot of him.

He had silver slicked back hair, that revealed a widows peak and showed his pale good looking face emphasizing his dark colored eyes, she couldn't see what color they were despite his closeness. He was very broad. It would take like two and a half of her standing shoulder to shoulder to make up his. And not because he was fat, no, she didn't think he had any of that. He was just a big guy. A very toned, handsome big guy. But then again what did it matter how good looking he was her attacker? The pretty ones were the dangerous ones after all.

"All right just calm the f—k down." He ordered snarling anger in his voice as he glared at her. Now that almost made her laugh. He was telling her to calm down, while his entire body language screamed 'I want to kill you' and pinning her to the ground. Was he totally insane? Some of her incredulous thoughts must have shown because his eyes narrowed dangerously. It was oddly familiar.

"Dammit, you're supposed to be the smart one!" he growled frustrated. Niamh blinked in surprise. He was familiar. But where had she seen him before?

"Perhaps I'd be able to think better if some nut job wasn't _pinning me to the ground!_" she managed to hiss, when she finally caught her breath. His eyebrow twitched, but he did lift up his body a little to give her more room. Thankfully this allowed her more room to breath. Unfortunately it didn't make the position any less bearable. It did however give her enough light to see his eyes.

"_Ayame?!_" He grinned roguishly, or perhaps a better word was smirked, well now she knew what those romance novels always meant, and it was not very comforting, it had a sort of feral and evil in it.

"In the flesh."

… … … … … …

"Just stay here." Niamh told him a while later. The man-cat, cat-man, former cat, whatever the hell he was, blinked at her. Niamh was slowly learning that Ayame as a man followed orders, and took to them, about as gracefully as he had as a cat. Unfortunately he was significantly larger now and not as easy to threaten. He made a show of smirking at her mockingly to show he'd only do as she said as long as he wanted to. Niamh had a sudden urge to hit him, but she shoved aside her violent impulses and opened the door to the main building, where her, Seiko, and Xavier's lab was located. She had to get her car keys and prayed to every god she'd ever heard of that Ayame would behave just this once. Considering how he looked that wasn't likely. Both because he'd attract attention by his looks or he'd do something stupid. Or both.

… … … … … …

_**Hidan's POV**_

It was interesting to see the girl who, for all purposes, he had been sharing a bed with the passed few weeks, in his human form. She was a lot smaller than she'd looked before and her reactions were different. Plus she was easy to annoy and Hidan wanted payback for the indignities she'd put him through. Well that and she was going to need to stop blushing so much considering she'd be living with _Deidara_ of all people. Well, Deidara and him, but she was too tiny for his tastes. Breakable and all that. And the red hair reminded him of Sasori. Hidan shivered in horror at the thought, before noting the looks he was getting.

It was from some girls near by. They were like Leslie, which in itself made him not want to be anywhere near them, blonde, tall, leggy with pretty faces. Only unlike the other more annoying and feminine version of Deidara, they had a much harder glint in their eyes and rather snobbish air. Rich bitches, he decided dryly, noticing their, scant, but expensive looking clothing. Hidan pointedly ignored them, waiting for his own red haired bitch to come back.

"Hey there," a girl said behind him, in what she clearly thought was a seductive voice, unfortunately for her, it made her sound like she had a dry cough. Hidan just gave her a look out of the corner of his eye. She was the blondest, richest looking one of them all.

She smiled seeming to take it as a sign of encouragement. "My friends and I just saw you standing here alone and wondered if we could help you out. You're clearly new after all, and we'd be oh so happy to help in _any_ way." Hidan almost snorted as she fluttered her eyelashes at him. Jashin-sama, why did women actually think that would work. He gave her an unpleasant smirk that would have sent any male running in terror. Unfortunately it didn't have the same affect on females, well except Niamh, but she'd been so in shock about her _little_ Ayame turning into a man, she didn't really have time to notice when he'd given it to her. This one on the other hand did and Hidan thought she might have actually swooned-_they really do that!_-and then smirked triumphantly. _Oh Jashin-sama he'd encouraged it!_

… … … … … …

_**Niamh's POV**_

When Niamh found Ayame her first impulse was to laugh. Cammie's attempts at wooing him were far from subtle, but most definitely amusing. If it had been anyone else she would have applauded his self control, very literally, especially considering she was pretty sure the impulse control problems he had when he'd been a kitten still held true now that he was human. But then she saw the way his eyes narrowed with annoyance and decided it was best to get him away quite quickly. Especially when Cammie looked up at her and muttered something to him that caused the man to look downright murderous.

"Oh, hi Niamh!" the girl told her brightly in a falsely friendly voice, eyes cold and unfriendly at Niamh's interrupting her flirting. Ayame gave her a dark glance clearly meaning 'What the hell took so long!' Niamh simply showed him her keys, and turned to the girls too stressed to bother with niceties.

"We're going." she told the girls bluntly, not exactly rude, but most definitely not friendly or even semi-polite. The two facsimiles mouths fell open slightly, looking at her clearly startled that the small red head who'd been given an exemption from them due to her close relation to Leslie, a former friend and leader, dared challenge Cammie. Cammie seemed in a similar state of surprise at least until the fact that she'd been challenged finally reached her. Her eyes narrowed and her nostrils flared.

"So you know the new guy, Niamh?" questioned the girl politely eyes meeting the younger girl's. Niamh knew the subtle challenge and meet her gaze. This girl was nothing, but a small bothersome fluff ball and Niamh was not in the mood to deal with her silliness, it reminded her painfully of Leslie before she grew up, which in turn brought up unpleasant memories of the incident and _**him**_.

"Yes," she told her giving her the glare that always freaked Reagan and Leslie out sure enough Cammie looked away after a few seconds. She turned to find Ayame watching amused. "Come on." She told him turning away, the girls quickly jumped out of her way as she marched towards her car. Ayame trailed behind her chuckling darkly under his breath.

"Call me!" Cammie yelled finally as they walked away, causing Ayame to snort. Niamh groaned massaging her temples as she opened the door and got in. She didn't bother looking at him as she drove away from campus, though she occasionally felt his gaze on her when he wasn't staring at the passing scenery.

"Ayame." she finally managed, throat tight.

"Hidan," he corrected instantly, causing something in her mind to click in place. She jumped startled, jerking the wheel as she did. Thankfully the road was empty and she only made them to leap off the road.

"WHAT THE HELL?" he yelled turning to stare at her and then froze seeing her expression as she just gaped at him. "What?" he questioned, stiffly, nervous under her gaze. She looked away from him too shocked to comment as she numbly stuck the key in and turned the car on driving down the road perfectly calm as her ranting mind settled into a numb certainty.

_My cat turned into a naked man._

_Said formally naked man is named Hidan._

_Hidan as in the fictional character Reagan has a shrine of._

"You gonna tell me what the hell that was about bitch?" he questioned casually, looking at her intently.

"No," Niamh replied never taking her eyes from the road.

"And why the hell not?" he sounded a bit irritated. Niamh ignored the question a few moments as a familiar driveway came into view.

"I don't like you." she told him bluntly as she turned off the car. Hidan blinked at her, clearly not having expected this. He's face contorted into a scowl.

"And why not, bitch?" she turned to look at him blankly. "You were in my shirt bastard." She answered and turned marching to the house her perverted cat-anime character-Jashinist trailing behind her, grumbling under his breath moodily. She opened the door in time to catch Leslie's words.

"So we all agree not to tell Niamh anything until we have to?" Leslie questioned. The other girls nodded and Niamh lost her temper.

"_Now what do we all agree not to tell Niamh?_" the girl asked her voice cold. The girls screamed and looked at her shocked and terrified as she felt Hidan appear behind her.


	7. Itachi's Cinnamon Buns and a Show

**AN: Damn Sasuke keeps mistaking logs for people...I used a Naruto abriged reference! Another Pairing decide, maybe anyway.**

**How do you feel about?**

**Deidara/Savannah**

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_**Savannah's POV**_

Savannah winced at the cold glare Niamh was giving them, but mostly from the slight hint of betrayal that flashed briefly in her eyes. Leslie grimaced, eyes repentant and Reagan refused to look at the girl, suddenly finding the hard wood floor covered in the black carpet she'd picked out quite interesting. Savannah noted the disgruntled Jashinist trailing behind her and blinked dumbly realizing that Niamh-chiraptophobic as she was-had been left alone with a naked Hidan.

"You two," she barked barely sparing Savannah a glance, as she turned to glare at Reagan and Leslie. "Explain why you decided to hide this." She demanded. Her voice was perfectly cold and emotionless, but her eyes were hard and fierce. Savannah heard a gulp from behind her and jumped slightly, to find the masked Akatsuki member. She thought his name was Tobi, maybe? The only ones she recognized were Itachi, Sasori, and Deidara.

"Why do you think it was only us?" Reagan questioned, and continued reasonably. "You caught Savannah agreeing too." Niamh raised an eyebrow.

"You think Savvy would honestly have kept this from me?" she sounded almost amused, but when Niamh was angry that wasn't a good thing. Savannah saw the way Niamh clenched her fists at her side, keeping a carefully distance from everything, as if touching something would set her off. Reagan sighed and Savannah felt a bit offended. Did they honestly think she was such a pushover? Niamh's brown gaze met her own and she relaxed. No, it wasn't meant as an insult, Niamh just would have picked up her odd behavior and Savannah would have confessed when she realized Niamh knew.

"So now what?" Leslie questioned nervously. Niamh looked thoughtfully sitting in the love seat and crossing her legs. Savannah relaxed with her, knowing she was forcing herself to calm down.

"I'm tempted to Tsuykuyomi the lot of you," she mused, pointedly ignoring the way not only the shinobi, but Reagan and Leslie flinched violently at the word. "But it would be rather pointless what with _them _being here." she decided looking at the assembled members curiously. "Besides I'd like an explanation before I decide. But introductions are in order." Savannah blinked along with the less stoic Akatsuki members at the easy way Niamh accepted the fact that she had fictional characters in her house. Savannah watched the way her eyes lit up as she began trying to match the Akatsuki with their kitten counter parts.

"Bruce," she said calmly pointing to Kisame who sprawled out on one of the smaller couches, taking up the piece of furniture easily.

"Hoshigaki Kisame," he introduced himself politely glaring at Deidara, who'd snickered at the name. This caught Niamh's attention who smirked at the handsome blonde arsonist/pyromaniac/terrorist.

"Nemo, obviously, and the one behind you is Marionette." Niamh purred, smiling widely at the twitch in Deidara's eyebrow when he heard the name. Savannah bristled.

"It isn't that bad." she muttered under her breath offended, so only she could hear. But then again she'd forgotten she was dealing with S-Class Criminal shinobi not normal people. Deidara turned on her, an evil gleam in his eye.

"Not that bad, un!" he snapped. "It's horrible! You named me after a fish! A deformed fish!" Savannah glared at him.

"Nemo is a perfectly decent name!" she argued. Sasori though quickly cut Deidara off before he could reply, pulling the blonde's ponytail. Deidara turned around with a mixture of insult and incredulousness. "DANNA!" he protested vehemently. Sasori ignored him and turned back to the red head in the seat before him.

"I'm Akasuna no Sasori and this is Deidara." Savannah noticed the recognition quickly followed by perplexed and curious expression on Niamh's face.

"Sasori of the Red Sand?" the girl translated causing everyone to stare at her surprised. Savannah blinked. Wasn't Niamh totally Naruto illiterate? How did she know the name? Niamh looked at them and sighed.

"One of my friends is half Japanese, she taught me the language so the name was simple to translate." The red head explained. Savannah smiled remembered the sweet little Seiko girl.

"Perfect, the bitch knows our language," Savannah, and everyone, heard Hidan mutter under his breath. What was wrong with him? The girl wondered.

"Okay, now continuing, I suppose that makes you Pain and Bella," she stated pointing to the quiet members in the back.

"You may call me Leader-sama, this is Konan." He explained calmly. Niamh blinked at him.

"Fine then," Savannah watched her pause, not liking the look in her eyes. "Leader-_san_," she finished ignoring the slight narrowing of Pein's eyes as she switched to Konan. "Konan-san," she acknowledged respectfully.

"Tobi and Iccup," the two Akatsuki nodded quickly introducing themselves with a "Tobi thinks it's nice to talk to Niamh-chan!" and a "Zetsu."

"I already know who you are," she drawled dismissively, glancing at the silent Uchiha, before her eyes rested on Kakuzu. Savannah's mouth dropped, as did most of theirs, when Niamh promptly got to her feet and casually walked over to Kakuzu, before gently pulling off the mask, he'd found in the attic and examining his stitches, even daring to hesitantly touch them.

"Hello Stitches," she greeted, and if Savannah wasn't imagining it, allowing an affectionate tone to creep into her voice.

"Niamh," he greeted pleasantly, snickering at Hidan's aghast expression. The man seemed even more shocked than the rest of them by her behavior. "You may call me Kakuzu." Niamh actually smiled.

"It's a pleasure to meet you Kakuzu-san."

"Just Kakuzu is fine." A sound of disbelief broke free from Hidan and Savannah's throats simultaneously as Niamh blushed. _Blushed!_ Of all things at the man's invitation for lack of formality.

"Okay, just Kakuzu," she said shyly as everyone stared incredulously at the scene before them. Hidan recovered first.

"WHATTHE HELL?!" his voice ripped through the silence, looking downright murderous. "YOU F—KING INSULTED ME WHEN YOU FOUND OUT I WAS HUMAN! AND YOU JUST ACCEPT THAT BASTARD WITHOUT EVEN BLINKING! AND YOU EVEN F—KING BLUSHED! _BLUSHED!_ FOR THAT FREAK OF NATURE!" Niamh turned to Hidan bristling and Savannah realized that they'd obviously missed something _major_ for her to hate the Jashinist so intensely.

"Maybe it has something to do with the fact that Kakuzu didn't watch me undress and crawl in my f—king shirt you f—king pedophile!" she snapped, eyes flashing. Savannah shared a look with her roommates numb with shock. Niamh cussing? _Niamh cussing!_ It as official the world was going to end.

"I am not a f—king pedophile, bitch!" he argued defensively.

"Talk to the hand man whore." she replied casually, flipping him off.

"Hidan." Pein whispered dangerously as Hidan opened his mouth to reply. The Jashinist looked up at the man disbelieving, but realizing he was serious, he shut up and shot Niamh a dirty look that clearly said this wasn't over. Niamh's eyes narrowed dangerously as she flipped him off with her other hand, and Savannah realized Niamh had found a scapegoat for her anger. This could not end well.

… … … … … …

_**Deidara's POV**_

Deidara couldn't help, but snicker as Hidan got into, yet, another fight with the little red head. The girl had so far won them all either by out cussing, a phenomenal feat in itself, or twisting his words around on him until he got so frustrated he marched off with a shout of "BITCH!" obviously trying to repress the urge to kill her. Niamh he noticed had a similar reaction every time he got within ten feet of her. Bristling and glaring at him. Plus the girl was clever and devious enough to make Hidan's life hell for getting on her bad side. Kakuzu seemed to be enjoying his partners suffering and was silently mocking him for the girl's obvious preference of him over Hidan. It was fun to watch.

Another thing he found interesting was the Savannah girl. True, she blushed easily and had a rather gentle nature, but she beneath it all she wasn't a true pushover. Plus she was an artist and there was something slightly off about her that he couldn't quite put his finger on. It made her quite interesting to him. Not in a romantic way. Deidara didn't have relationships with women very often. It was a bit difficult with the whole 'S-Class Criminal Traitor to Your Village' thing going on. Plus most were very annoying to him. The only ones he had found bearable was Konan (who belonged to Pein), Niamh (who reminded him too much of his Danna) and Savannah (who wasn't his type). In fact the only people he spent a significant amount of time with was his Danna, Tobi, and Kisame-san. Though he and Hidan were drinking buddies when they actually wound up meeting in between missions. A rare occasion indeed.

Personally, now that they weren't cats, Deidara thought this mission was a good idea. They all needed a vacation and as long as the Crazies (aka Reagan and Leslie) left him be, he was perfectly find taking said vacation right there. Leader-sama of course didn't see it that way and as soon as the girl's were in bed he called a meeting.

"First off," the stoic man began glaring at them all menacingly. Deidara barely repressed an eye roll, after being semi-molested by a fangirl he no longer found Leader-sama's lesser glares very intimidating. "Konan and I have decided it would be, prudent, to set some ground rules for interactions between the organization and the girls." Deidara blinked, before turning to smile maliciously at Hidan's dumbfounded expression at the pointed look Pein sent him.

"First off, the girl's must be escorted by an Akatsuki member wherever they go. The girls are assigned the same members as when we were animals." the man informed them calmly, daring them with his eyes to question his judgement. Deidara noticed Hidan twitch violently out of the corner of his eye and mutter something insulting towards Niamh under his breath, but he didn't argue. The bomber meanwhile, in the part of his mind not chuckling evilly at his co-workers discomfort, was wondering what he could do to keep himself entertained, while guarding the girl…

It took a few moments of silence and Sasori elbowing him sharply in the ribs for Deidara to be drawn from his daydreams and realize Pein had been trying to talk to him. The blonde bomber cleared his throat nervously, before looking up at his leader. "Yes, Leader-sama?"

"I said you are not to blow up anything, while we're here Deidara." Pein hissed dangerously, clearly annoyed by the lack of attention. While his heart sunk somewhere near the ground Deidara nodded his head quickly, to assure Pein he would definitely not blow up _something_, while they were in this strange world. How could this man honestly expect him to give up his art? He'd find a way around it, he had to. Until then he'd make do with torturing his fellow members, especially Hidan who was laughing at him in the background, and possible his charge.

"…and finally Konan and I have located the general area of the person we are searching for." A 'hell yeah!' was heard from Hidan's direction. Pein gave him a withering look before continuing. "They are somewhere in this town. You will use the girls to find out information on the townspeople and give me a list of anyone you suspect is a candidate. I'm sure you've all noticed the unusual aura these girls give off, they are for the moment at the top of the list, but we can't be sure. Dismissed." Deidara sighed, trailing behind Sasori, they'd been given one of the extra rooms right beside Savannah to share. How much longer was their stay going to be anyway?

… … … … … …

_**Itachi's POV**_

The next morning Itachi woke up early, not that that was unusual, but what was unusual was the fact that someone else was already up. Hidan's purple gaze flickered up to the Uchiha briefly, before turning back to the television eyes not really caring about the snowstorm in the Midwest. Itachi decided to go into the kitchen realizing someone else was awake and had a pretty good idea of who by the way the silver haired man glared at the kitchen door muttering something about 'prissy red haired bitches'. Sure enough Itachi opened the door to find Niamh finishing a glass of what appeared to be the drink called coffee, Leslie seemed fond of it and constantly reeked of it, while reading a paperback dog eared book entitled _Catholicism For Dummies_. The Uchiha briefly wondered what Catholicism was, but his thoughts were interrupted by a sweet smell in the air.

"What-?" he began as the cooking timer went off. Niamh smiled at him clearly amused as she stood and went over to the oven, taking out two pans full of a sweet breakfast pastry Itachi couldn't identify. She then began spreading vanilla icing on one and orange tinted icing on the opposite pan. After finishing she quickly filled the two pans, after putting the others on nearby plates, with uncooked dough and stuck them in. Then she went back to her book leaving the room filled with silence. Itachi glanced up at the clock and noted it read five in the morning.

"Cinnamon buns," Niamh said after a few minutes casually flipping through her book. Itachi gave her a questioning look. She smiled seeming to sense it despite never glancing up from her book. "They're cinnamon buns, a type of sweet breakfast pastry. If you don't like sweets I can make something else." The girl looked up at the Uchiha obviously determined to play the part of polite hostess.

"They're fine," the stoic man answered calmly eyes flickering to her book question in his eyes.

"I'm majoring in Theology this year." Niamh explained serenely. "Catholicism is one of the major religions in our world." Itachi nodded and went back to examining the room.

"You could eat one if you want." Niamh suggested, breaking the silence once more. Itachi looked up hesitating slightly. The girl smiled at the reaction. Itachi wondered at this, her personality seemed completely different from her actions towards Hidan, then again Hidan sometimes had that effect on people and he truthfully didn't know much about the other girls. The Akatsuki had mainly focused on their assigned female only in the presence of the others when they gathered together.

"It tastes better with milk," Niamh told him quickly getting to her feet and scooping up four of the cinnamon rolls. "Would you like some?" She looked over her shoulder, Itachi quickly nodded relieved that they'd found some common ground, even if it was just milk. Niamh poured them both glasses and was in the middle of giving Itachi his food when a snort came from the door. Hidan was there glaring at the girl, predictably enough. Niamh returned it with vengeance.

"Man whore," she greeted coldly, before sitting back in her seat.

"Bitch," Hidan returned. Itachi calmly sipped his milk observing the hostility bemused, by the reaction. Niamh seemed, to him, someone hard to rile up, obviously Hidan's sparkling personality was doing its magic though. It was also interesting to realize that the girl's speech changed quite quickly from the polite aloof tone she used towards the others into a more informal familiar speech she used around the females, Kakuzu, and apparently Hidan, though their conversation was a bit more vulgar and aggressive than the ones between those she liked. Hm, as much as she seemed to dislike him he was still more trusted than the rest otherwise she wouldn't show so much emotion.

"So bitch, you gonna serve me like the Uchiha bastard?" the Jashinist questioned flopping lazily in an open seat. Niamh raised an eyebrow.

"No," she told him bluntly.

"And why the f—k not?"

Itachi nibbled the white bun. Hm, sweet.

"I already said I didn't like you, man whore, is your brain so small it can't comprehend it?"

Itachi finished it quickly, taking a sip of his milk to cleanse the clinging sweetness.

"I'm not a man whore, bitch." Hidan snapped back. "And aren't you supposed to be polite to guests, or some shit like that?"

Itachi reached for his second roll wondering why it was orange.

"Man whores aren't welcome."

Itachi took a delicate bite out of the foreign food. True dango commonly came in different colors, but he'd learned long ago not to completely trust anything he ate.

"I'M NOT A MAN WHORE!"

Orange, he decided, orange was better with its interesting tang.

"You walk around without a shirt."

He got up to get more grabbing two orange and refilling his glass, before his eyes went up to examine the growing argument. Hidan was red in the face and Niamh had a gleam in her eyes similar to a cat playing with its prey before eating it. Itachi briefly considered stopping them, but in his more Deidara-ish moment, sat back and watched, popping another orange cinnamon bun in his mouth.

"THAT DOESN'T MAKE ME A WHORE, BITCH!"

"Is that the only insult you have?"

"THAT ISN"T THE F—KING POINT!" Niamh suddenly went silent cocking her head to the side. She surprised them both by smiling.

"You know, I think you're right." Hidan blinked and Itachi ate another bun sensing she wasn't quite as innocent as she looked.

"Right how?" Hidan questioned suspicious. Itachi looked at Hidan surprised at least he wasn't _that_ stupid to trust someone so easily.

"You aren't a man whore."

Silence.

"About f—king time, bitch-" Hidan began, a triumphant smirk on his face. Niamh smirked in return.

"You're a slut, whores are smart enough to get paid." she chirped jumping up and pointedly ignoring the sputtering Jashinist as she grabbed her breakfast and book practically skipping out of the room.

"Hello Kisame-san," her voice greeted pleasantly before the tall blue man entered the kitchen yawning and blinking at them drowsily.

"So what I miss?" he asked obliviously. Itachi snickered as he finished his last bun. Hidan turned to the Uchiha bristling.

"DON'T EVEN UCHIHA BASTARD!" the Jashinist snarled before turning to shout after Niamh. "F—K YOU BITCH!"

"You wish pedophile!" she yelled before they heard the door slam and a feminine scream as she woke up one of the girls. Itachi chuckled again. Perhaps it wasn't so bad.

"Breakfast over there," he told his partner before leaving to go through the books they had here. He'd thought he'd seen a few maps earlier…

… … … … … …

_**Reagan's POV**_

When Reagan managed to pull herself out of bed shortly after noon she wasn't surprised to find Niamh had left her breakfast in the microwave to heat up, or the note attached to it. What did surprise her was the note's contents.

_**Ray,**_

_**Here's breakfast. I made cinnamon rolls and surprisingly enough the Uchiha loved them. He ate like ten by the time I'd left and was going back for more. Savannah ran off to the studio to escape our…guests. The blonde, Deidara, and Sasori went with her. Something about being curious about art. For some reason she looked like she was going to have a panic attack. Any thoughts on why? There's an exhibit today, and yes you already agreed to go. Kelly's probably going to be there, which in turn means Beast, aka Zack, you're needed to protect Savvy from the perv. Speaking of perverts, the Man Whore-**__**Yes Hidan I am back to calling you that so stop reading over my shoulder, thought so**__**-(Sorry I didn't want to waste my breath talking to him) is stalking me and insisted on following me to school. I tried driving, but he ran beside the car…Anyway watch the house. And Anthony called. He said something about keeping his promise. We need more groceries, oh and get them some clothes. You know where the money is, use it all we need them to blend in or as much as possible anyway.**_

_**~Niamh~**_

"What are you doing Reagan-san?" a voice whispered in her ear causing the girl to jump with a shriek. She heard a snicker behind her.

"**I don't think she likes that Tobi,**" Zetsu warned the masked man who'd barely dodged the slap, she'd instinctively started. "Yeah, you're gonna get hurt." Reagan glared at the plant man before turning back to the cowering masked man. _Honestly, secret leader of the Akatsuki my ass_, she mentally scoffed.

"Yo Akatsuki!" she yelled out stomping into the living room. "Meeting!" The criminals quickly filtered in startling a bored Leslie who promptly fell off the couch.

"Is there any particular reason you've called _my_ organization?" Pein whispered darkly. Reagan smiled at him only slightly nervous.

"Well Leader, we need to get ya'll some clothes so your freakiness doesn't stand out!" Reagan chirped pleasantly, before turning to examine the Akatsuki in front of her. "Okay, Itachi and Konan definitely need to go, Tobi can come if he takes off the mask and Leader can come, but the rest of you stand out too much." She informed the assembled group, eyeing Kisame and Zetsu pointedly. They glared at her, but she ignored them turning to look at Pein questioningly.

"I'm not going, decide amongst yourselves," Pein snapped and quickly disappeared. Konan and Itachi shared a look before nodding.

"Itachi and I will come." The blue haired woman stated. Leslie jumped up happily.

"Well I'm coming, I've got to make sure Ray, doesn't dress you all up freaky like her, the purpose is to blend in after all!" the blonde said cheerfully, before grabbing Konan's arm. The woman's startled amber eyes flickered to her.

"Come on Konan, time to get dressed!" she chirped eyeing the baggy clothes the woman wore scathingly with her wide blue eyes. "I'm sure we can find you something both practical and nice!" Reagan twitched at the insult, but quickly walked off after Tobi announced he'd be staying with Zetsu, Pein, Kisame, and Kakuzu.

"Don't break and or steal anything!" she told them, giving Kakuzu a pointed look, thirty minutes later as the group gathered to depart. Kakuzu gave her a cold look causing her to smile cheekily in return. They quickly settled into Reagan's precious car, though the shinobi hesitated for a few seconds clearly not trusting the vehicle.

"Where are we going?" Itachi asked after a few moments of silence.

"The mall and then the grocery store, we need to stalk up with all you here. You can't eat cat food after all, though now that I think about it. It would be a lot cheaper…" Leslie grinned mischievously at the look the Uchiha gave her. Reagan rolled her eyes. Leslie, unlike most of the towns fan girls, found Uchiha Itachi annoying and psychopathic. Obviously she was taking advantage of the situation.

… … … … … …

_**Leslie's POV**_

Leslie was sure she was going to strangle the Uchiha, he was so damn picky and kept picking out the most expensive stuff. Damn spoilt Uchiha brat. At least he wasn't a whiny bitch like Sasuke. Nope he was just a log. And we all know Sasuke hates the log. Leslie snickered at the thought gaining her a blank stare from Itachi. She ignored him going over the cheapest clothes he picked out (Still about sixty dollars per shirt!) She sighed as the Uchiha gave her one of his glares at her reluctance.

"I could pay." he suggested noticing and annoyed by her hesitation.

She glared. "Hell no, we aren't using money you steal. We're doing this like decent people." He raised an eyebrow clearly indicating he found her scolding an S-Class Missing-nin at being a decent person pointless. She huffed angrily and grabbed the cheapest clothes to pay. Thank god he'd listened to Reagan and bought his pants at the thrift store. Otherwise the rest of them might not have gotten clothes.

"We're never letting him shop again," Leslie hissed quietly o Reagan, too late realizing she was dealing with ninjas who could hear her every word. Itachi raised an eyebrow, but instead of commenting drew Konan into a conversation.

"Why?" Reagan asked curious and amused by her friend's reaction.

"He's the most annoying, troublesome man ever!" Leslie snarled, glaring at the unfazed Uchiha. "I mean, god, I thought woman were picky!" Suddenly an idea entered her mind and she smiled viciously.

She quickly stage whispered, "Now I see why his boyfriend's the man in the relationship." She than gave Itachi a secretive glance. The Uchiha stiffened and turned to glare at her murderously. Reagan shoved her fist into her mouth to suppress the giggles as the other shoppers looked towards Itachi shocked and quickly began whispering about the 'pretty, effeminate young man' and how it was always the 'ones with nice bodies' who were 'fruitier than fruit salad' and how it was obvious since he painted his fingernails. Leslie's smirk widened into a full blown grin. Ah, sweet revenge.


	8. Hidan Does Shakespeare and Trouble

**AN: Another short chapter, but only because the next one will be really long and this really would make it a bit _too _long. Sorry for not updating for a while, I got caught up in my new story **_Another Chance, _**another fic about the akatsuki. Check it out if you haven't already.**_**

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_**Niamh's POV**_

The small red head and the tall silver haired man shared a glare oblivious to the whispers of the college students walking by. They all knew the girl. Niamh Finley was famous in their town. Both because of her famed intelligence and her family issues were public knowledge, or at least some of it was. The reasons behind what they did know were a mystery, but they all knew it had something to do with Leslie's half brother. They also knew the petite girl was usual a quiet girl who focused more on her studies than people. So seeing her with what most considered the epitome of all things hot was more than just a little shocking. By the time the day was over rumors that Niamh was engaged to him were all around campus, not that they knew anything about it. Yet anyway.

"You will behave," Niamh told Hidan, narrowing her eyes at the mocking smile.

"And how exactly are you going to make me bitch?" he countered. Niamh felt her eyebrow twitch slightly, but she simply smiled back. It wasn't exactly pleasant and had been enough to make most people, who possessed any self-preservation instincts, run and hide.

"Oh, I can think of a few ways Man Whore. Kakuzu-san mentioned something about an incident involving sake and Deidara in a dress." she practically purred, smiling mischievously as Hidan paled eyes going wide. He glared.

"You wouldn't f—king dare." He snarled. Niamh raised an eyebrow.

"I think even you'd know by now that yes I f—king would. Now come on I agreed to help Kelli and the others by critiquing the performance." Niamh told him briskly, turning around and not bothering to make sure he was coming.

"I know, dammit, I was there," Niamh bristled fists clenching at the memory.

"I doubt it's very wise to remind me of _where_ you were when I agreed Man Whore." The girl told him with a false calm. He scoffed and muttered something that sounded like, "I'm going to f—king kill, f—king Kakuzu."

"I don't think you're Kakuzu-san's type." Niamh told the man venomously. He looked down at her and gave her that weird feral smirk that sent a shiver of fear down her spine.

"You would know about the bastard's type wouldn't you, Bitch." Niamh promptly dug her heel in his foot, before elbowing him in the stomach. She quickly regretted the later, feeling her elbow bruise. She'd almost forgotten how ripped Hidan was.

"So says the pedophile, jealous are we?" Niamh said in reply as he glared at her, not really hurt, but obviously not happy with the fact he was getting beat on by a fifteen, soon to be sixteen, year old girl and couldn't do anything about it.

"Yes I'm so jealous over a skinny flat prude of a little bitch like you," he drawled sarcastically. Her elbow hit his nose this time and ignoring the "F—K!" she walked away blinking at the moisture in her eyes. True she had gotten plenty of insults before and didn't even blink at the worse names Hidan had called her, but that bastard had just quoted, almost word for word, _**that man**_. It was enough to piss her off. He quickly caught up with her, cursing all the way. Niamh refused to speak with him despite his attempts a conversation or rather arguments.

"Why hello there Lovie!" Reese greeted happily as Niamh walked in the theater. The girl's eyes instantly flickered to Hidan and then back to Niamh. She raised an eyebrow.

"Lover's spat?" she questioned in a too innocent voice. Niamh glare and Hidan's loud profanity filled protests were enough to make the girl smile crookedly and raise an eyebrow.

"Me thinks the Lady and Lord doth protest too much," Noticing the look in Niamh's eyes though, she quickly clicked her tongue and turned gesturing for them to follow. "Lovie's love life aside, it's time you two helped us. It seems our Romeo foolishly got mono, he's back up being the one who gave it to him, nothing like that, they shared a soda." She scolded as Hidan spluttered. "How dirty your mind is Lover." Hidan and Niamh froze blinking at Reese owlishly.

"Lover?" Hidan questioned stunned. Reese blinked.

"Yes Lovie," she pointed to Niamh. "And Lover. Speaking of you, Lover will you be our Romeo?" Reese begged grabbing Hidan's hand and giving him puppy dog eyes that could rival Tobi's.

"No he can't," Niamh quickly cut in. Reese looked at her with a pout and Hidan, of course, glared.

"And why the f—k not, Bitch?" he questioned indignantly. Niamh grimaced. Damn now she had to deal with his manly pride.

"Because you can't, Man Whore," she snapped back giving him a pointed look. He ignored it and seemed to focus on the fact that he was being ordered around rather than how stupid he was being.

"You know, maybe I just f—king might," he told her eyes narrowed. He looked at Reese and gave his signature smirk. The girl's eyes widened and her hands fluttered in front of her.

"I accept."

"No," Niamh said, beginning to panic. She couldn't let this sociopath near all these innocent people. He glared at her, but suddenly smirked.

"Too bad you got no f—king sway now, isn't it Bitch?" That stubborn bastard! He turned to Reese. "Now who the f—k is Romeo?" Reese blinked and smiled sheepishly, cheeks coloring pink.

"Oh Davidson will help you, just tell her you're the new one," she told him weakly pointing to the wide eyed blonde who watched from the stage. He nodded, throwing Niamh his mocking smirk. Damn him. Damn him to hell. She thought frustrated, before turning to Reese who was eyeing him with an expression eerily similar to Reagan's when she'd looked at Hidan, it contained a bunch of heat and longing.

"Well Lovie I have to congratulate you, Lover had me almost shiver out of my clothes with one look, I can't imagine touching him. Well I could, but nothing under PG-13." Reese blinked down at the slight girl. "Something wrong? You look sick."

Niamh shivered horrified by the thought of doing…anything, with Hidan of all people. Oh, god where was the bathroom?

… … … … … …

_**Savannah's POV**_

Savannah knew how she was going to die. And she did not feel enlightened or accepting or any of that shit some people would claim they'd feel. No she was pissed. Because she knew she was going to die from either a heart attack caused by the two idiots in front of her or by Deidara deciding that the sculptures weren't artistic enough and blowing something up. This made her tempted to run far, far away, but she regrettably enough had a conscience that wouldn't allow her to abandon the innocent people who loved art gathered at the studio to their fates.

"Please don't touch Deidara, the artist spent a really long time on it." Savannah begged as he insisted on touching, yet another sculpture, this time one of a Pegasus. He looked at her blue eyes curious as his head cocked to the side.

"Fine, un." He said stepping back, but keeping his gaze on her. Finally his intense eyes turned to the next piece, just when Savannah was becoming really uncomfortable under his gaze, which Sasori had been examining lazily. Savannah sighed with relief and followed behind the two men fretting and pulling at her shirt anxiously trying to think of ways to get them back home without causing a scene. God this wasn't good for her nerves. No matter how much Reagan absolutely adored these nut jobs, she couldn't handle them in real life.

She turned feeling the tap on her shoulder only to be pulled into a tight hug by a grinning Kelli. Savannah smiled returning it. Kelli was one of her few friends outside the 'family'. But unfortunately the good mood brought on by the appearance of her friend quickly disappeared when she saw the two figures standing behind her. One was Zack, who was bad enough, but the other made Savannah's heart sitter to a painful stop and her eyes widen. The shaggy haired blonde merely cocked his head to the side blue eyes filled with a cruel sort of glee.

"Hi there Savannah, you looked surprised to see me. I was sure I called Mom and Dad ahead of time, they should have warned Les." The man said smiling widely. Savannah didn't answer completely frozen in spot as Zack dragged a concerned Kelli away leaving the girl at his mercy. Noticing they were alone he smirked. Even that didn't mar his handsome tan features.

"So how's Niamh? I so hated leaving my little doll all on her own," he pouted in a falsely solemn tone and his face suddenly brightened. "I guess I'll have to pay her a visit, won't I? Then again knowing my doll she'll be here soon enough won't she?" He smiled and walked past her gently bumping into her as he did. Savannah stayed frozen in place until a hand finally laid on her shoulder turning her to look into another pair of slim light blue eyes. They were the exact color of a hot summer day back home she realized nostalgically, even through her panic.

"Savannah-san?" Sasori question uncertainly, eyes wary as he took in the dawning comprehension and fear that took over their hostess.

"What's wrong, un?" Deidara questioned seriously, causing her brown eyes to turn back to him. Savannah closed her eyes and swallowed a deep breath. It calmed her dizzy mind and she turned to the ex-Iwa nin.

"Trouble," she croaked. The Akatsuki shared a long look falling defensively at her sides, with mock casual gestures so not to alarm those swarming around her.

"What type of trouble, un?" Deidara finally asked his sharp blue eyes scanning the area.

"The type that families keep hidden in their closets," the girl informed the shinobi her voice bitter and eyes suddenly angry as her fists clenched at the rage coursing through her. Sasori looked at her sharply eyes demanding answers.

"Th-that _thing_ that just talked to me used to be Les's brother Andrew." she told them.

"Used to?" Sasori repeated eyes examining the crowd in vain for a messy head of blonde.

"Yes, used to, Les was basically disowned from the family about two and a half years ago." Savannah explained and quickly continued at their questioning glances. "Back then all of us were really different Leslie was a snobby bitch, Reagan was a quiet church girl, and I, well I was still living with my Grandmamma, god bless her, and Niamh was, she was quiet, I doubt anyone ever heard her say more than ten words a day. Her mom, Lydia, was really, really bad and hated Niamh. Les thinks it's because her father never wanted to marry Lydia, but still loved Niamh and visited her every day. Lydia was jealous, apparently she was practically gleeful when Niamh dad disappeared, Niamh was crushed and only two months later she married Les's dad. Niamh was only six and Leslie was eight, Andrew was eleven. Les really hated everyone at the time so she took it out on Niamh and acted like she didn't exist. Andrew was really twisted even back then and was probably the only one to treat her with any sort of kindness since her dad's death so nobody was really surprised when she latched onto him like some puppy." Savannah paused taking a deep breath.

"Pardon my interruption Savannah-san, but Niamh-san doesn't seem like the type to 'latch on' to anyone." Sasori pointed out causing to Savannah grimace as Deidara nodded with agreement.

"I'll get to that, so anyway, Niamh adored Andrew she did everything he said and well he treated her alright, sort of like a pet. But anyway when she turned thirteen he started acting different, he'd decided she was cute apparently and started messing with her. Niamh was thrilled she'd been in love with him for years." Savannah stopped seeing the questions in Deidara's eyes.

"But wait isn't he her brother?" Savannah shook her head and quickly explained.

"He's Les's half brother, from her mom, Les's Dad just likes him and lets him stay whenever he wants to, Lydia likes him too and didn't mind he was interested in her girl." Savannah spat in disgust. "So no Deidara he wasn't her brother in any since of the word."

"When you say messing with her you don't mean…?" Sasori began trailing off, Savannah shook her head.

"No, the bastard never went that far. Well after awhile he got bored with her and started playing sadistic little games with her mind and eventually when he had her completely and utterly devoted to him he broke her, he completely humiliated Niamh and destroyed her world." Savannah told them her throat burning and eye blurred with tears of fury. "Niamh's life was really, really bad. Andrew was the only thing that kept her going, he _was_ her life. She couldn't handle it anymore and tried to OD on some of Lydia's meds. Leslie and Andrew found her. She almost died and tried it again. Eventually Les got out what had happened from her. It totally shattered Leslie's innocence and made her feel horrible. Leslie promised to protect her and went to Lydia and Les's Dad for help.

"They didn't care, Andrew was their favorite and Les's Dad did whatever his wife told him. Eventually Les confronted Andrew and told him to stay away, he didn't and so she convinced the court to make them emancipated minors. They moved into the house Niamh had got after her Grandmother died and eventually Reagan moved in after her parents kicked her out. After that they found me in an old apartment. Grandmamma died so I was on my own and not doing too well. They took me in and we've been together ever since. We're all each other has." Savannah sniffled slightly, rubbing away more tears angrily trying to ignore the emotionless expression on the S-class criminals' faces. "Andrew left for college that year and hasn't came back to town since. Him being back can only mean trouble and be really painful once he confronts her, and I know he will. We've got to warn them." Savannah decided and reached for her cell phone.

"Mother f—k!" the girl called the words sounding odd on her usually innocent voice coupled with her accent. "The bastard stole the phone!"

"Deidara go contact Leader-sama and inform him, he will want to know and will be able to contact Hidan and in turn Niamh," Sasori ordered and the blonde quickly left to find a secluded spot to do the jutsu. The redhead turned to the girl and patted her shoulder.

"Don't worry Savannah-san everything will be fine, un." Deidara assured her as he walked away. She meet Sasori's gaze and knew he was thinking the same thing. No it wouldn't. No chance in hell with this ticking time bomb. Well as they said out of the frying pan and into the fire.


	9. Out of the Frying Pan and Into the Fire

_**Niamh's POV**_

Niamh had to admit that Hidan made a very good Romeo. True, he still didn't know the all the lines, but he was trying and he was surprisingly enough very convincing. He put real emotion into the art and you would almost think he really did want nothing more than to spend his life with Kelli if you hadn't known it was acting. There was only one problem. Every time he got confused or couldn't remember exactly how a line went he'd improvise, and his improvising always contained quite a bit of profanity. Reese loved it. You could actually see in her face how much she relished his change in expressions the rough language in his dark silky voice that just as beautifully sang the old words of Shakespeare with new life. Niamh was impressed. And as much as she hated it was admiring him for his skills. By the end of the day he'd memorized half the lines and had half the girls panting after him. Even Niamh embarrassingly enough had fallen under a temporary spell from his words.

Hidan noticing her quiet questioned her on it, very colorfully, and she snapped out of her daze snapping back at him. Niamh relaxed thankful that moment was over and spent the rest of the day explaining to her teachers that Hidan was observing their classes and trying to keep his interesting vocabulary to a minimum in the classroom. Finally she headed towards the car dragging her feet a humming man trailing behind her.

"So now what, Bitch?" Hidan asked, sounding downright cheerful as Niamh yawned.

"Savannah's studio is holding an art exhibit, we're all going." She told him.

"I bet Deidara-chan and the Puppet Bastard are thrilled," he said scathingly. Niamh raised an eyebrow and clicked her tongue in disapproval.

"Honestly Man Whore, first Kakuzu-san and Deidara-san, when will you realize none of your fellow members are interested in you?" she teased blithely, ignoring his incredulous look.

"What the f—k?" he questioned eloquently. Niamh smiled, or smirked rather. "I don't like either of those bastards!" he protested growling at her smirk and knowing look.

"That wasn't what you were saying about Kakuzu-san earlier and look at what you're calling Deidara-san. Chan? Honestly Man Whore it would make anyone suspicious." Niamh pointed out surprised by how much she actually enjoyed arguing with Hidan. His jaw dropped.

"I do not like men!" he shouted at the top of his lungs. Niamh nodded as if indulging a child her smirk clearly showing she didn't believe a word of it. Chuckling mentally at his aghast and frustrated expression she turned to find them almost their. That was quick.

"You know it would be a lot more convincing if you weren't so obsessed with your looks. No straight man takes that long in the bathroom or is that obsessed with their hair." Niamh told him sagely causing him to scowl. She smiled innocently and parked, noting how dark it was. Because of her distraction she didn't notice the vengeful gleam in his eyes. All she knew was the next second she was pinned to her door by a smirking Hidan.

"What the-" she began startled eyes wide as she took in the man.

"Language," he practically purred into her neck, arms on either side of her blocking any route of escape.

"What's with you?" she questioned coldly glaring at him to hide her unease. He smirked and took a step foreword so they were almost touching.

"Proving something." He drawled out breath tickling her face. The gooseflesh stood up on her arms and her heart skipped a few beats as the familiar smirked crossed his features twice as dark and three times as feral. There was something predatory in his eyes. She leaned away back pressing into the car unconsciously trying to make more distance. He simply drew closer.

"Proving what?" she questioned as haughty and derisive as could be lifting her chin and giving him a disdainful look. His smirk widened and he stepped foreword so that they were now touching, his lean form pressed against her slender one.

"That I prefer women." He told her silkily warm voice blowing on her bare neck, before his lips gently touched it. Cursing herself for having short hair she met his dark violet eyes and thought one thing. _F—k._

… … … … … …

_**Hidan's POV**_

Hidan barely held back his laughter as the girl shivered and shook. Jashin-sama this was fun! If he knew the Bitch was really a prude he would have teased her. He could almost hear the f—k she thought when he kissed her neck. His whole body started shaking to stop his laughter. She looked at him eyes huge and he couldn't hold it in anymore. He took a step back and burst out laughing.

"Priceless! Your face was so f—king priceless!" he cackled at her indignant expression. He ignored her puffing up, it was sort of like a kitten hissing, funny, but not scary, and kept laughing. When he looked up though he paused. Her entire body was shaking and she didn't seem to be able to look at him, head turning to look at her surroundings as she bit her lip hard enough to draw blood, but her eyes kept darting back to him no matter what. She didn't talk, but the cold fury that was written on her face reminded him of this morning only much worse. This morning she'd looked like she was remembering something painful, now she looked like she was experiencing a whole new pain that was twice as bad as the old one. Hidan's smile disappeared into a pout.

"It was a f—king joke." He muttered angrily returning her glare with one of his on. She gave him a look of such revulsion he started, surprised by the ferocity. She spun around and walked away carefully avoiding contact with anything. He quickly followed hand shooting out to catch her shoulder only to have her spin around and slap him across the face. Hard. Hard enough he saw stars. It was different from her other little attacks, this one actually hurt and he could feel blood in his mouth where the inside of his mouth had hit his canines.

"Don't touch me!" she snarled. Hidan drew back frowning. What the f—k was with her? They'd been harassing each other back and forth since she'd first seen him human. Why the hell would she snap so suddenly? He cocked his head to the side as she glared at him anger, disgust, and something else…hurt (?) rolling off her in waves. He took another step foreword opening his mouth to speak only to have her jump out of his reach. He froze recognizing the look in those brown eyes. It was like a beaten animal. And it was that that made him not protest when she stomped away to enter the building leaving him alone to his thoughts.

_Why did she always have to ruin my fun?_ He questioned scowling and feeling oddly guilty. He scoffed at the thought. Him, Jashin's Immortal Favorite, feeling guilty? Preposterous, especially over offending the delicate sensibilities of the little red haired slut he hated. He did hate her didn't he? Well maybe not completely. She was entertaining after all. A toy he decide with a smirk. She was his toy. Comfortable with his decision he entered the building to track down Niamh and figure out what her problem was. Though, he realized scowling, he'd have to be all sensitive and all that pansy shit because she'd obviously had issues. He rolled his eyes. Everyone he knew had issues and major ones. And he was always stuck with the shitty job of being the Akatsuki's unofficial therapist. Now he was apparently moving up in the world to being a teenage girl's therapist! Oh the f—king joy.

… … … … … …

_**Leslie's POV**_

Gods she hated Itachi. Well perhaps not hated, she would get to that stage soon though if he kept this up. In truth her dislike of him was most likely unfounded, since technically he hadn't done anything to her except exist, but that as enough. Everyone always made him out to be such a tragic hero, while Sasuke was evil, but they always conveniently forgot exactly what this Uchiha had done. He may have been ordered to do it, but he still killed his clan, or helped anyway, murdering every man, woman, child, and infant. Except Sasuke, who he'd left alive to suffer. True Sasuke had made a bunch of horrible decisions, but he'd always been influenced in some way by Itachi's actions. The thing that she hated most though was she could totally understood why he'd done it.

If she knew the only way to make Niamh at peace with all the things she'd been put through she'd make the girl hate and eventually kill her in a heart beat, because Niamh was all she had. She loved her little sister, not even related by blood, just as much as Itachi apparently loved his brother, but that still didn't excuse what he'd done. No matter what reasons he was a ruthless murderer and reminded Leslie too much of Andrew's cold façade for her not to hate him. And right now was no exception.

The Uchiha was predictably enough just as picky about his tea as he was his cloths and refused any of the selection Leslie had offered him. Honestly right now Savannah's semi-crush and the fact that they were in public with too many witnesses, and just maybe the fact he was an S-Class criminal, was the only thing keeping the Log Bastard alive.

"Fine we won't get any then," she snapped only to have the Uchiha to frown in displeasure and gently place one in her shopping basket with a politely inquiring look. Leslie rolled her eyes, but let the packet remain she looked down and sure enough it was the most expensive brand in the story. Bastard, she thought to herself and dug in her pocket for her cell phone, handing her basket to the Uchiha and sending him to pick up the remaining things on her list she flipped open the phone and began scrolling.

Soon enough she found Reagan's number and selected it.

"Yo," Reagan greeted, sounding distracted and slightly annoyed.

"Remind me again why I agreed to take the Log Bastard." Leslie ordered irritably, not really caring if Itachi heard her.

"Because Konan likes me better," Reagan told her. "No the other one, yeah the pink one, oh Savvy's allergic." Leslie heard a sigh and a distant voice that sounded like a woman, she assumed it was Konan. She was startled though when a male voice joined the fray.

"Who's that?" the blonde questioned instantly curious. Reagan growled, rather it was at her or whoever else was with her, it wouldn't be Konan, Leslie didn't know.

"Anthony insisted on making good on his promise to visit me and he just had to choose now." Reagan growled, Leslie bit back a giggle, she could almost hear Ray glaring at her childhood friend. "He's curious about Konan, told him she's a friend of yours from out of town." Leslie rolled her eyes, like that was believably, she hadn't really left town since the incident and before Konan, as embarrassing as it was for Leslie to admit, would be the type of person her old self would classify as not worth her time. Then again, she thought dryly, so would most of he current friends and new Akatsuki associates, well except Itachi, _then_ she'd be throwing herself at his feet. Leslie snorted at the thought causing the Uchiha, who was passing by to enter another aisle to look at her with his bored eyes. She ignored him and went back to her conversation.

"Honestly Ray couldn't you say she was yours at least he'd believe that," Leslie pointed out. She heard the pout followed by a sigh.

"Yeah, but he also would know I was lying because he knows he would have met her before know, sucks to have friends who know you so damn well." The girl muttered annoyed. Leslie grew a grin and rolled her eyes at the dramatics.

"Yeah, Ray, totally sucks." Leslie muttered sarcastically and ignored the insulted huff she received in answer.

"So anyway how-DON'T'T TOUCH THAT ANTHONY, YOU IDIOT!" the girl yelled and suddenly caught off, but not before a very loud crash and the sound of breaking glass was heard. Half amused and half pitying Leslie moved on to the next person in her list, Savannah, after all Niamh had, once again, left her cell phone. She listened to it ring watching Itachi's head go through the crowd over the short shelves.

"Hello Savvy, how the Idiot Artists treatin' yeh?" Leslie questioned amused by her friend's plight and knowing Savannah would no doubt be out for blood by now.

"Idiot Artists? Honestly Lil Les, I expected better manners from you," a very smooth, very masculine voice purred on the other line, making Leslie's blood run cold.

_No._

_He can't-_

_Oh god._

_Niamh._

"What are you doing here?" she finally questioned, voice soft and body numb from shock and terror. A soft chuckle greeted her question.

"So Mother and Father really, didn't warn you, pity and here I was hoping you made up." He chirped happily. _I'll kill those bastards._ Leslie decided as she listened to her brother's deceptively trustworthy sounding voice. It was so smooth and soft and gentle you couldn't help, but believe every lie it spun like a spider's web and soon you were trapped under his thumb. Leslie felt a sudden burst of pure undiluted hatred spread through her body as he continued.

"_What the hell are you doing here_?!" He chuckled again.

"Nostalgia?" he suggested practically purring. Leslie practically choked on her distaste. He laughed again and Leslie felt something in her growl. "I didn't think that would work. If you must know I'm here to see my little doll."

Leslie took a breath, she had to stay calm and think rationally about this. "How did you get Savannah's phone?"

"Oh you mean that cute little _Savvy_ girl?" he questioned mockingly. Her blood boiled. "It was rather easy, she was so…terrified I believe the word is. Absolutely terrified that I was there. It seems you've been telling tales on me little sister," he said the pout in his voice. "That's not very nice. Hm, lookie, lookie, it seems the guest of honor has arrived." Leslie anger deflated just as quickly and her muscles locked with cold terror.

"If you touch her I will-" she began angrily already sprinting towards where she knew Reagan was waiting, completely forgetting about Itachi.

"Save your threats for later." He said in an unpleasant monotone and suddenly grew cheerful. "Ta-ta!" The line went dead and Leslie's sprits turned to full blown running. She barely noticed Itachi appearing by her side as she turned around the corner to find Reagan yelling at Anthony who was covered in what appeared to be tomato juice. She was holding a pale blue kitten. This fact didn't register in Leslie's mind nor did the fact that Konan was gone and Itachi was still human.

"RAY!" Leslie shouted slipping to a sudden halt.

"It's about time this idiot-" the girl began black hair fluffing up like a cat's as she glared at Anthony accusingly.

"We don't have time! Andrew's back!" Reagan instantly shut up, her eyes widening and her already fair skin paling to a sickly pale shade.

"Oh goddess, where's-" Leslie interrupted her again shaking with anger and terror.

"He found her! I think he's at Savvy's show!" Leslie told her voice becoming higher pitched with every second. "We need to go now!" she demanded looking at everyone. Itachi was looking at the blue cat curiously, Anthony was gaping at it and looking a bit sheepish as he held some woman's clothing and Reagan looked aghast, the only one who seemed to realize exactly how bad the situation was.

"Alright let's calm down, we need to warn Niamh," Reagan decided reaching for her cell phone.

"She left it at home again." Leslie told her. Reagan scowled eyes looking as panicked as Leslie felt.

"Its too late she's there." A monotone informed them. Leslie turned to blink at the Uchiha who seemed to be focusing on another conversation. "Leader-sama says that Deidara just informed him of the situation, Andrew is waiting and Niamh-san just walked in. Hidan's being alerted and told to get her out. Deidara and Sasori are watching Savannah-san so she is safe from this man. We are to go and help." The Uchiha blinked a few times eyes focusing back on them. Leslie did something she knew she'd regret later. She threw her arms around Itachi's neck in bone crushing hug. The Uchiha froze in obvious surprise.

"Come on we've got to go!" she told them and took off in the direction of the entrance. Leslie knew one thing. If Hidan managed to get Niamh out of there she was kissing him.

… … … … … …

_**Niamh's POV**_

"You are f—king overreacting!" Hidan snapped glaring at her as he trailed close behind, but still giving her enough space she felt relatively secure. The red haired girl ignored him focusing on the hall in front of her breathing very slowly to control her anger.

That bastard. How dare he do that to her! True he thought it was the same thing as before, but this was different! It was f—king different! She repressed a shiver remembering how he'd looked and how close he'd been. She hadn't ever had something like that happen before. Her cheeks flushed with heat remembering how she'd felt his smooth muscles through her shirt. No that was a lie she had had something like that happen before. And that made it worse. The only time any male was interested in her was when they were f—king with her! It hurt more than she'd expected. As much as Hidan annoyed her she, foolishly enough had expected better from him than to act like-like _that man_!

Dammit! She was not crying! Niamh froze startling Hidan and turned to glare at him. He blinked down at her obviously confused, but surprisingly calm and almost guilty looking?

"Just leave me alone." She told him looking up at him. He, even more surprising, didn't comment for a few moments looking uncharacteristic thoughtful as he tried to find the right words. For some reason this calmed her slightly, well that and the slight guilt, yes it was definitely guilt that was in his pink-purple eyes.

"What did I do wrong?" he questioned very slowly, looking at her and waiting patiently. Niamh blinked. Hidan was not a patient man. She'd known him for a very short time and even she knew that. Yet here he was forcing himself to wait. Her remaining anger fizzled to an abrupt halt.

"I don't like to be touched," she admitted slowly, reluctantly. He nodded clearly trying to look understanding. He waited and Niamh just looked at him. He scowled.

"That it, no f—king sob story explanation, no pansy ass whining about how the world has wronged you, or anything?" he questioned incredulously. Niamh almost smiled, if her feelings hadn't been screwed up she would have even laughed. Instead she shook her head. He snorted. "Damn, that's a lot easier than dealing with those other pansies. Who knew a f—king teenage _girl_, would be less emotional than a bunch of f—king dangerous S-Class missing-nin." He snorted again. "F—king _pathetic_."

"Come on Man Whore we need to go." She told him and they entered her still keeping a bit of distance between them. Just because she wasn't mad at him, didn't mean she totally forgave him. Yet.

"Shit!" Hidan said suddenly. Niamh turned to see what was going on only to be pulled to a chest.

"Hello there doll," a familiar voice whispered into her ear. Niamh's breath hitched in her throat and her eyes widened meeting Hidan who spun around quickly to find her.

"_Andrew._"

… … … … … …

_**Hidan's POV**_

"Shit!" Hidan said suddenly feeling the presence in his mind.

_Hidan,_ Pein whispered in his head.

_Damn Leader! Freak me out why don't you!_ Hidan replied.

_Be silent Hidan, we have a problem. _Hidan rolled his eyes at the grave monotone. Honestly what the f—k could happen in this world of weaklings?

_Well what the f—k is it?_ The Jashinist snapped annoyed at the silence.

_Deidara has informed me of an enemy of our hostesses. He will try and contact Niamh, you are to get the girl out of there. Immediately._ There was no doubting it was an order and despite Hidan's usual lack of respect towards Pein even he knew better than to outright disobey him. Grumbling to himself he looked up to find where the girl had gone to. He scowled. Some prick had grabbed _his_ thing and was holding her. He met her gaze and realized she was f—king terrified. So this was what's his name.

"Andrew." Niamh said. Well that cleared that up.

"Let her go f—ker," Hidan ordered. The man looked up at him and smirked as he took him in. Hidan's scowl deepened. He was used to the civies being so terrified of him that they never questioned his orders, true Niamh didn't listen, but she didn't even seem to listen to Pein that much and even he thought Pein was f—king scary.

"So who's this little doll, did you replace me?" the man teased his blue eyes amused as he whispered in Niamh's ear with a pout. Hidan's eyebrow twitched. _F—ker,_ he thought angrily, _Touching my girl and ignoring me!_ Niamh didn't answer switching between looking at the blonde prick with that same beaten dog look she'd given him and looking towards Hidan fearfully. Hidan growled. What the hell had the bastard done to scare the Bitch? The little prissy thing wasn't afraid of nothing, well except earlier when he… Suddenly it clicked. So he's the f—ker that messed her up! Hidan gave the man a feral grin. Oh, he was going to enjoy this. After all he hadn't given Jashin a sacrifice in forever and he was just obeying orders be eliminating what was preventing him from getting the girl out after all. He stopped his step foreword though when he saw Niamh take a calming breath and fix Andrew with a glare that rivaled Pein's on a bad day.

"Go. F—k. Yourself." She hissed and elbowed him in the gut quickly jumping out of reach and closer to Hidan. Hidan smirked as the man doubled over. True the girl's hits weren't all that horrible to a shinobi, unless she caught you off guard, but to a civie the Bitch was pretty damn strong.

"Ha, ha, ha," the blonde chuckled looking up at her with a grin, that made Hidan frown at the familiarity. "That's my little doll, fierce as always." Hidan saw Niamh bristle, but also noticed how her hands shook slightly. Damn, she really was freaked out and as entertaining as it would be to watch her beat on the blonde bastard he had orders.

"She's not your anything asshole." He told him voice mocking as he quickly pulled her away, to her surprise. Andrew narrowed his eyes at the arm that pulled Niamh closer suddenly looking very possessive.

"Come on Bitch time to go." It was a testament to just how uncomfortable she was that she didn't protest about the arm over her shoulders or how she was tucked in his side nicely. Unfortunately the prick couldn't leave it at that.

"I'll be seeing you soon little doll, after all _we're meant to be_." He mocked, causing Niamh to flinch into Hidan. Hidan looked over his shoulder and frowned before flipping him off. The man just smirked eyes looking predator as he watched the small red head at Hidan's side. Hidan scowled and pulled her closer throwing open the door that led outside. They were greeted by the Uchiha, Konan, and the Crazies, as Deidara had dubbed Reagan and Leslie. Hidan's eyes zeroed in on the blonde girl and it clicked.

"What the f—k!" he shouted arm tightening unconsciously around Niamh. "Why the hell did we just have to deal with a f—king sadistic male you, huh bitch?!" Leslie ignored him and rushed foreword to pull Niamh away from him and into her arms. He growled and got a half reprimanding, half startled look from Konan. Uchiha looked thoughtful and raised an eyebrow at the behavior. Hidan didn't bother explaining, he didn't know himself why he suddenly felt so possessive about _his_ Bitch. All he knew as he didn't want Leslie near her until he knew why the guy Leslie, the Andrew Prick was messing with her.

"What the hell is going on?!" he demanded again as Reagan rushed foreword to block Niamh from view and whisper to her quietly along with Leslie who simply ignored him focused on the slightly shaking girl in front of her.

"Well explain later." A monotone behind them stated. Hidan turned to find Sasori, Deidara and Savannah coming out. The other girl quickly rushed foreword to join her housemates and check on Niamh. Hidan's now ever present scowl deepened and his eyebrows drew together. They obviously knew what was going on, and he wasn't moving until he knew what was wrong with his Bitch! Sasori frowned at him and Deidara, seeming to realize his thoughts, spoke.

"The Asshole messed with Niamh-san when she was a kid, now he's back to f—k with her again." Deidara growled. Hidan's scowl turned to a frown and he looked towards where the girls had converged. His eyebrows drew together again and a sadistic light entered his eyes as they darkened. The bastard could try. He still needed that sacrifice after all.


	10. Shopping and Hidan Using Possesives

**AN: Not completely back in the grove for this story so don't expect quick update, I've just been working on this short chapter in between Another Chance's outline.**_**

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Niamh's POV

Niamh didn't look at the others as they sat in silence. Leslie had taken over the task of telling their story and Niamh was content with standing away from the rest of them. She didn't meet any of their gazes, nor did she react when Leslie told of her attempted suicide. She could practical feel disgust rolling off them. The girl mentally cringed; of course they'd be disgusted. They would live short lives because of their profession and had probably seen countless loved ones die. They fully grasped the value of life and she'd almost squandered hers. The feelings intensified as Leslie began to explain their parents' reactions. Niamh jumped to her feet, she couldn't take this. Their disgust and disapproval only served to make the memories returning so sharply to her all the more vile. She needed to sleep anyway.

"We should all get some sleep," Leslie whispered contritely, so as to make it look less like Niamh was running from them. The others agreed mutely and quickly began to drift away, Pein holding the exhausted cat-Konan, whose head kept drooping. Niamh moved as quickly as she could on her light feet without making it look like she was running. Finally she got to her bedroom, her safe haven in her torment and threw open the door quietly closing it behind her. Gripping the doorknob tightly she listened to the soft whispers of the others' movements. Closing her eyes she leaned her hot forehead against the cool wood.

She heard one of the others stop outside her door. It was one of the shinobi, she could tell by the eerily soft whispering of their feet brushing against the floor. The unearthly grace and balance revealed in the near silence. Niamh didn't speak listening, listening so focused to the breathing on the other side of the door. It was a calm quiet breathing and its steady rhythm eventual calmed the girl. Niamh knew, she just knew, they, whoever they were, could tell everything she was doing on the other side of that door and they knew that Niamh knew they were there.

Niamh felt her heart clench at the gesture. Who was it? What did they want? Slowly Niamh's hand turned the doorknob. Brown eyes met oddly calm violet. Niamh's hand tightened again on the doorknob. It just had to be him didn't it?

"Hey Bitch." Was all he said. But it was enough to cause Niamh to stiffen and jerk. His eyes spoke volumes when combined with his quiet, silky voice. He didn't find her disgusting or cowardly. He didn't want to avoid her because he thought she'd snap. He was Hidan. And she was Niamh. She'd call him Man Whore and he'd call her Bitch.

"Stop being a drama queen." he demanded gruffly, silky deep voice contrasting more than usual and making her feel all shivery again, despite how angry she should have felt at his callousness. "We are f—king S-Class Missing-nin, traitors, murders, psychos. We. Do. Not. Care. What. You. Did. You are nothing compared to us. So stop acting f—king emo and get back to being my annoying bossy know-it-all Bitch. Believe me, one emo is enough. And Itachi already possesses that position." Niamh looked down at the ground and her heart felt a little lighter.

He didn't care. The words came to her. She wanted to say them. She really did, but something choked them in her throat. It came out as a breath of air and a mouthing of words. "Thank you."

Hidan didn't comment and eventually Niamh looked up. Something odd clung to her mind as she looked into his eyes for who knew how long and watched him walk away.

_My. He called me his._

… … … … … …

_**Leslie's POV**_

Leslie was one hundred percent sure that Itachi was avoiding her, which was pretty hard to do since she was almost one hundred and ten percent sure Pein had assigned him to watch her. God, why did the Log Bastard have to be such a drama queen? It was a hug for pity's sake not a marriage proposal. Snorting at the thought she eyed Kisame out of the corner of her eye. His henge really did help, and why none of them had thought to use it before was beyond her. Honestly they were supposed to be geniuses, yet it hadn't even crossed their minds. Reagan and she had just assumed they couldn't for some reason. But when Niamh had mentioned something about it, one of the few things that she'd over heard them discussing about Naruto, the reaction had been immediate.

Hidan had gaped at them all realizing they hadn't thought of it and muttered a quick, "F—kin' heathen morons," before storming out of the room glaring at the bible, which he wasn't allowed to touch after a certain incident a few days ago when he'd tried to burn it. Itachi's eyebrow had twitched and he'd almost looked embarrassed, Leslie could swear she saw his cheeks dust pink a few seconds. Konan and Pein didn't react simply looking at their other members with thinly veiled disgust and a 'I already knew that, I can't believe how stupid you are for not' expression for Konan and a 'why did I hire these idiots' one for Pein. Deidara had blushed and glared at the wall. Sasori had blinked once and gone back to deciding what version of Pinocchio to watch, real or animated. Kisame had smacked himself in the forehead with a curse, and Tobi had given a squeal of happiness before attempting to hug Niamh, only to have a knife fly from the kitchen. Narrowly missing his head, and successfully stopping his approach. Leslie was certain she'd heard a familiar voice from the kitchen mutter, "F—ker, should know better than to touch _my_ bitch." Kakuzu had paused all of five seconds before calling missing persons to see how much the reward for tracking down people was. Needless to see the news was soon reporting the _saint like, generous, hero_ who was returning children to their families. Zetsu simply closed his flytrap on them.

Shortly after Kisame had volunteered to help her with the shopping, eager to escape, and she'd had to spend an hour convincing him to leave Samehada behind. Assuring him it would be under Itachi's, who had decided not to accompany them, watchful gaze. Kisame had made sure to threaten the rest of the Akatsuki with loss of several appendages if they dare touched _her_. Leslie, in a rare moment of tact and self-preservation refrained from commenting on this unhealthy obsession with a _sword's_ sex.

Bored since the shopping experience was turning out to be rather dull without Reagan to lighten things up and with Kisame's quietness, she examined the henge. Kisame was a very tall tan man with hair so black it had purple highlights. His eyes were blue framed with ink brows and prominent, high cheek bones, his lips were full and every now and again would curve into an amused smile that only contained just a bit of blood lust. Combined with his built appearance Leslie had to admit he was pretty damn hot.

"Are you worried?" Kisame questioned, out of the blue, pun intended.

"Worried about what?" Leslie questioned startled. Kisame simply smirked at her knowingly. Something between unease and annoyance crept through Leslie and she suddenly felt instinctual worry towards Niamh.

"You haven't noticed?" he questioned airily, passively flipping some Trix cereal, the Akatsuki were oddly addicted to it, into the buggy.

"Noticed what?" Leslie snapped voice sharper than intended. Kisame gave her his shark-smile, as she decided to dub it, and cackled.

"I assumed you would have, being a girl and all, plus you'd think the older sister would have some sort of instinct." Kisame continued clearly amused. Leslie temper, worn short from the past few days snapped.

"Don't f—k with me shark man! Especially not over my sister! What the f—k are you talking about?" she snarled lowly, eyes narrowing in an unmistakably hostile gesture.

Seeming to realize he'd gone too far, Kisame took a few steps out of her range and eyed her warily. "I was just talking about her and Hidan." At the intensity of her glare he continued. "They were acting odder than normal this morning, I mean they barely even argued, something's up." Leslie froze and bit her lip.

Shark-man had a point. They had acted odd. Hidan hadn't even cussed all that much. Niamh had been quieter than usual, casting odd looks at the immortal. Plus their insults had been half-assed at best. Honestly, by now they almost sounded like terms of endearment…Leslie gasped turning around to glare accusingly at the smirking Kiri-nin, as if this had somehow been his doing.

"No. Hell no! My sister and that sociopath are not happening!" she told him shrilly. Kisame snorted and Leslie narrowed her blue eyes at him. No, she couldn't let this happen. It would be one thing if it had been Kakuzu or Deidara, hell even Log Bastard was preferable! But her delicate little sister couldn't be allowed to fall for that man. This wasn't a fanfiction! This was real life!

"Calm down," Kisame told her reassuringly, noticing her despondent expression. "Neither of them have noticed. And with Hidan being Hidan, and Niamh-san being basically oblivious to all this and her little crush on Kakuzu, I don't know if they'll even notice their compatibility. A shame, I think they'd look cute together." Leslie simply snarled at him in response, mind running elsewhere at a thousand miles per hour.


	11. Hidan Gets Decked

**AN: I know this is horribly short. Looking at this it should probably have been part of the last chapter. My apologizes, but it will get bigger and better. I am back in business.**

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_**Niamh's POV**_

Nobody spoke about what had happened that night. Though judging by Hidan's glaring he had wanted to. Thankfully, one glare from Pein had been enough to shut him up. Niamh also knew Pein wanted the full story, but Leslie had also relieved her of that unhappy duty. She'd spent the next few days avoiding people and planning. Andrew wasn't an idiot and he certainly wouldn't have come back in town just to torment her, though to him it was probably an added bonus. No, he was planning something, wanted something. And whatever it was couldn't be good.

Niamh wasn't the only one in the house feeling off though. Reagan was uneasy about something. Niamh had noticed it recently and it only seemed to grow with the close approach of the Ostara, scheduled for March 21, only ten days away now. In fact, everyone in the town was on edge recently. The others hadn't noticed with the stress of the shinobi guests, but something was off…

Niamh sighed scrubbing the dishes and trying to ignore Hidan's presence from where he sat watching her at the table. She knew he was bored. She knew he was irritable. She also knew he hated her silence, because then he had nothing to do. Niamh frowned. They'd been discussing some things to do with their _house guests_ recently. They had all agreed, with great vehemence from Leslie and Reagan that they needed a place where the Akatsuki could train. They all noticed that even Pein, Itachi, and Konan, who were usually quite calm and stoic, were showing signs of agitation for being locked up. Bored, irritable, cabin fevered shinobis were not what they wanted to ave to deal with.

"Can Tobi help Niamh-chan?" a childish voice asked from behind her. Niamh turned with a smile. She liked Tobi. She really did. He was the type of person that drew her in with his bright cheerfulness. But she could also tell he was hiding truer facets of his personality from everyone. That orange spiral was hardly his only mask. Plus, there was the half fearful, half uncertain way Leslie sometimes acted around him. As if expecting something to snap. She clearly knew something she wasn't eager to tell or possible couldn't without prying ears. Reagan on the other hand got along with him swimmingly. Treating him sometimes like a wayward child, sometimes like an annoying pest, but most of times with the same friendly civility the paranoid girl treated the rest of the world.

Niamh nodded keeping up her pretense of silence, acting as if she did not notice the glares Hidan was sending the masked Akatsuki. The kitchen was filled with a pleasant bubbly conversation that Niamh did not try to dissuade. Meanwhile Hidan's irritation clearly increased as the way a scowl drew up on his face, whenever Niamh nodded or shook her head when it was called for. She jumped slightly when Hidan suddenly rose knocking the chair over and storming out without a word back.

"Wha-" Niamh began only to be stopped by a soft giggle from Tobi's direction. Blinking in surprise she turned to him.

"Tobi thinks Hidan-san is upset." Tobi told her. Niamh had discovered recently that Tobi, not very surprising since she'd known he was hiding a lot, was actually incredibly intelligent and had had some interesting conversations with him. But she still found the childish third-person way he insisted on speaking amusing and couldn't resist a small smile.

"Why would he be upset, Tobi?" Niamh questioned a bit perplexed by the behavior. Not really that he would storm off, but more from the fact he'd stormed off with out even one insult or trigger for the behavior. Tobi's one visible eye looked down at her smilingly and knowing.

"Hidan-san is jealous." Tobi informed her conspiratorially.

"Jealous?" Okay, now she officially had no idea what was going on. Tobi sighed giving her an exasperated look. Hm, she was starting to get pretty good at this one eye thing, she noted mildly amused.

"Of course he's jealous, Niamh-chan is a pretty girl, and Hidan-san is a boy. Tobi is also a boy, so Hidan-san is worried that Niamh-chan will like Tobi more." Tobi informed her reasonably. Niamh looked at him for a few more minutes to make sure he was completely serious and snorted. Chuckling she went back to her dishes.

"I highly doubt that. Hidan-san—I mean Hidan doesn't like me, at all, besides," Niamh continued teasingly. "Tobi's a good boy, so why would Hidan need to worry?" Before she realized what was happening an arm wrapped itself around her waist and lips ghosted on her neck as he spoke.

"Oh, Tobi is a good boy, but Tobi is also a _boy_, Niamh-chan needs to remember that, and the fact that Niamh-chan really is a very _pretty_ girl." Tobi told her his voice losing its childishness, despite the third-person and suddenly sounding much deeper, and dare she think it, seductive. Niamh felt the heat raising to her cheeks as she gulped and nodded mutely. Suddenly her cheerful Tobi was back.

"But Niamh-chan is right. Tobi and Niamh-chan are friends, but Tobi doesn't like Niamh-chan like that. Tobi likes older women." he told her happily. Niamh promptly burst out laughing. They spent the rest of their time in companionable silence, Niamh still dismissing Tobi's suggestions, and Tobi's mind seeming to wonder. It wasn't until they were leaving that Tobi brought it up again.

"Tobi thinks Hidan-san and Niamh-chan would make a nice couple." He admitted causing Niamh to shake her head and open her mouth to protest only to have a gloved finger placed over her lip.

"But Tobi also thinks that Hidan-san doesn't realize it, yet. Neither does Niamh-chan, though," he continued sounding mournful, but brightening. "But Niamh-chan doesn't need to worry, Tobi will make sure everything works out." Before Niamh could protest he was gone, but not before she felt the odd sensation of something warm and slightly moist pressed against her forehead in a rather familial manner.

Niamh looked around the kitchen feeling perplexed, stunned, and slightly worried for Hidan. She liked Tobi, but _who_ _knows_ what the man would do to get his way.

… … … … … …

_**Hidan's POV**_

Hidan was pissed. And he didn't even know why he was pissed. All he knew was he wanted to go back there and rip off Tobi's stupid lollipop mask wearing head. That would only piss off Niamh though and Hidan was trying to his best to be gentle and understanding and shit until he could sacrifice that Andrew prick to Jashin. Then of course they could go back to before. But Tobi just has to make him want to kill him. Just because Hidan hadn't announced it to everyone, it shouldn't excuse the moron from going off and touching what was clearly Hidan's. Hidan paused. Had even made it clear enough to Niamh that she was his.

Of course! Hidan jumped to his feet cursing himself. How could he have been such so stupid! Clearly if Niamh knew she was his she wouldn't allow pricks like Tobi to flutter around her in such an annoying manner. But he'd have to make sure he worded it right. Niamh might have shown more intelligence and maturity than the rest of her sex at that age, but she was still a teenage girl. Hidan didn't want to give the red head in delusion of him _liking_ her, liking her.

Hidan stopped frowning at the kitchen entrance. He usually wasn't one to plan things, but this could be a serious matter. Jashin-sama was dead serious about the proper behavior of Head Priests. And Hidan wasn't any old Head Priest he was Jashin's Chosen. Hidan couldn't go make Niamh fall in love with him handsome and wonderful as he was. Jashin-sama frowned on harming innocents. Most especially innocents who were showing the god sense to be interested in Jashinism when they weren't acting like bitches.

When they were in between arguments Hidan actually enjoyed the discussions they had. Not that he'd ever admit it, but Niamh at least didn't cringe away or gape in horror from his religion. In fact they'd had an interesting discussion about human sacrifice taking place in so many religions in areas where the people could never truly have intersected. Niamh had said something about perhaps humans developing on somewhat similar paths no matter were they were located was a matter of genetics. Hidan felt perhaps it was a more spiritual level that made those groups more connected to the true god, aka his.

And if Hidan was being completely truthful to himself, which he usually was, it came with the blunt personality, he rather liked the girl's company and didn't want any infatuation she may feel to ruin it. Because Hidan was a lot of things, but he had morals and the girl was _fifteen_. He wasn't a pedophile, unlike a certain ex-Akatsuki member. Nobody said it around Itachi, but they all knew the _real_ reason Orochimaru was so interested in him and his brother. It certainly wasn't because of their f—kin' freaky eyes.

So he had to do this right. He could _not_ f—k this up.

Sitting heavily down on the couch he considered his options. He did not like asking for help, but talking to Leslie was probably his best option. Hidan perked up hearing the front door open and seeing a frazzled blonde step through.

Hidan grinned. "There you are I need to talk to you Crazy!"

Leslie froze and turned to stare at him as Kisame approached from behind giving Hidan an odd look and shaking his head. Hidan ignored this and without a moment's hesitation spoke.

"I need you to explain to the Bitch that she's mine!"

Leslie's eyes widened and the next second Hidan was cursing and clutching his newly broken nose.

"Okay, perhaps he isn't completely oblivious." Kisame said dryly.


End file.
